NOT TO STEAL MY MOM'S THUNDER...BUT..

I went to the hospital, in the middle of the night, by ambulance no less!!!  And that was the same night that my poor mom passed.  

Around 11 at night I was sitting in Kathy's big chair, drinking a mild rum and diet coke.  We had just left Mom at the home and we were quietly sitting kind of digesting the magnitude of it all when my chest started to hurt...like hell I might add.  I didn't say anything at first.  I thought it would just go away after a bit.

But it didn't.  It got worse and worse until I could hardly breathe.  At this point we had gone upstairs to get ready for bed, Spod was already asleep in bed.  (something he can actually do quite quickly, very unspodlike) Well, the pain got to the scary point and I called Aryn and bless her heart she whipped downstairs and got Kathy from her bedroom (as Aryn said she had no idea where we were address wise) called 911 and before you could say Bob's your uncle...a firetruck and an ambulance came screaming along (shovel list).  

They popped me into it (like you can actually 'pop' a giant person into an ambulance) and whisked me away.  And it being Tuesday night, so I am told, the emergency room was quiet and they hooked me up for an ecg or whatever its called, tested my blood, xrayed my chest and heart, made me swallow some horrible pink crap that numbed my tongue and throat and decided it was 'oesophageal spasms'.  Jeez did it ever hurt but once I drank that awful stuff the pain went away. I don't want it to happen again.  At least now I know I don't have lung cancer and my heart is just fine.

So we got home and went to bed and Kathy came in at 7:30 to tell me mom had just passed away.  Such a momentous eventful night.  I was just thinking that 3 weeks ago we were getting home from a trip, final packing, moving, final cleaning, unpacking, stupid jet lag...no rest for the wicked!

Now I do believe we are halfway through the preparations for the funeral.  We meet with the lawyer on Monday.  We will be going home on Tuesday.  This will give me two days to cook, shop and pack for the women's retreat that starts on Friday in Princeton.

I just reread this and it made me tired...so I am off to bed.  TTYL

SAD BUT RIGHT

Well our Mom is gone.  We arrived here yesterday afternoon and met Kevin and Aryn, Kathy, Jocelyn, Emily and Kerry at her rest home where she has lived for the last while.  She was comfortably set up in her own bed and not really conscious.  But now and then a little smile would cross her face and at one point she squeezed and rubbed Aryn's hand.  We left around ten last night, knowing that it would be very unlikely we would see her again, and she passed this morning at 7 o'clockish.

Yesterday was so special.  There was a brown box in the corner of her room, full to the top, with her diaries...dating back to the forties, poetry she has written over the years and stories of events in her life.  She love to write and she was quite gifted at it.  We read some of her poetry and told many crazy stories about her.  After all this was the woman who could shoot a running deer at 500 yards, shoot a rattlesnake on the deck, after accidentally shooting a hole in the floor and canned more pickled beets than Costco sells in a year.

Later in the evening, I don't know, maybe we were all tired, but we started to play charades in her room, with her right there.  We laughed and had such a good time.  At one point Monte phoned so we did face time and he could see us and we could see him.  So he played along too!  A very special time.

Today has been a long long day of many many phone calls to people and loved ones.  And Kathy, bless her, spent a great deal of time talking with the funeral home, making arrangements, writing obits etc....  We all headed over to Duffy's for a lovely lunch.  We laughed and had a great time.

Now its bedtime and I am so tired I am seeing double.  Time to go to bed!! TTYL

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WHAT???

I got a little feedback from a very unimportant source..but it did make me think.  Apparently, "SPOD" is disrespectful to Spod.  Apparently, this nickname could do 'emotional damage'.  Apparently, this nickname is mean and low down. All of the above apparentlies could be true.  Maybe not.  But...this is what people don't know...he has a nickname for me.  He has used this nickname for me ever since I had babies, went through menopause, quit smoking, took certain medications...and gained about 200 pounds.  And that name is BLISTER!.  Yes...he calls me his old Blister.  

When we are in Costco and he spies me way across the store,  he yells "Hey Blister!"  When he is in his chair, all comfy and feet up and he needs a diet coke, it's "Hey Blister!"  When a new neighbour, you know the kind, like Ned Flanders on Simpsons, the kind that knocks on your door and says "Howdoodoodelydoo there neighbour!" (shovel list), Bill shouts "Hey Blister, we have company!"  Its got to the point where I am thinking of renaming this blog to "SPOD AND BLISTER:  THE DYNAMIC DUO"  So don't feel too sorry for Spod.  

On one of our Costco runs I bought fake candles.  Aryn had told me about them.  They look sooo real, they flicker, white and different heights.  They came with all the batteries needed and a remote control.  I need to go back and get another set.  They were only 33 bucks!  Fantastic Xmas gift I must say.  But....there is one tiny draw back.....they smell like vanilla.  No.  Actually they smell just like the oatmeal muffins I used to bake in Bamfield.  So now, I am constantly craving muffins and sadly missing Bamfield all over again.

I just received a call from my sister in Kamloops.  Our mom is gravely ill, not responding to medication, and there is the possibility she may not pull through this time.  Even though she is 86 and has dementia and can't get out of her wheelchair etc...and its maybe a good and peaceful time for her to move to the next realm, where ever that may be, one is never ready to lose their mom. I look back at all she taught me and all the times she saved my butt, and at what a strong, quirky wonderful woman she was and know that I must hang on to those memories and share them with people.  That is who she really is.  

So, Bill will come back from Vancouver today and we will head up to Kamloops tomorrow and stay until we know.  Poor Bill,  he has no time to be old.  And poor Kathy family, they have been so close to mom and taking care of all her needs.  This will be especially difficult for them and I hope we can help in some way.  I shall be in touch.  TTYL.....(go hug your mom or if she is already gone, tell someone a good story about her)

MORNING COFFEE SPOT

STILL HAVE TO ACTUALLY HANG THOSE PICS

MMMMMM....MUFFINS

ON THE ROAD AGAIN...INTERNET HIGHWAY THAT IS

WOW!!!  We have internet that works!!  I say this trepidaciously (no matter how many different ways I spell that flipping word, a red line shows up under it).  Shaw has been on my shovel list for many many years so its going to take years to win my trust back.  And the guy that came was a total jerk, as was the one the day before.  He actually came into this living room and told me that the reason the internet was a tad slow was because of the distance I am from the modem!  I can see the damn thing from my chair here, just over there in my purple room!

My brain instantly went into incredulous battle mode.  WTF??? (I actually said those words)  The internet needs to work downstairs in the farthest corner!!!  Well, he says, these modems are really made for condos.  Well get a f...king one for houses!  His response?  Give this one a try and maybe we will have to move the modem.  So I asked if I could move the modem and how.  No No he says, you have to have a technician come in.  And that trip will cost you.  This one is free but the next one you have to pay for.  Well how about this? I say...lets do it now.  No No, he says again, lets just try this.  Phone if there is a problem.  Phoning entails a minimum of a half hour waiting on hold.

Then I asked him how to change the network name and password.  Every other technician we have ever had has always just got it ready helped us do it.  Not this jerk.  Well, he says, you have to put the blah blah in your browser and go into admin somethingorother, and find the change name and blah blah blah.  Never mind I say I will figure it out for myself.  And then I ask how do I get an email address?  Phone the office.  OMG!!  So I got huffy.  I DO NOT WANT TO PHONE THE FRIGGING OFFICE AND SIT ON HOLD FOREVER.  JUST TELL ME HOW TO DO IT WITHOUT PHONING.  CAN I DO IT ON THE WEBSITE IN MY ACCOUNT?  Well you could try he says.  Then I did something I have never ever done before....I kicked him out and told him if you are going to be that useless there's no point in being here.  JUST GO AWAY.  And he did.

I had a fantastic day yesterday.  And y'all know what that entails for me.  Not getting out of my pj's  Sitting in my chair with all my technology in front of me, Andrew spent the day in the other chair with his technology, and we had the tv turned to a Cops marathon!  He and I had the most enjoyable day, sitting in our chairs, looking up apartments for him and watching unfortunates be arrested and taken away.  Honestly, it was truly a little gem of a day in the middle of mayhem.  Then around five Andrew got all duded up and went out on a date.  So I was all alone in my new house.  Ahhhhhhh! Except for dogs that is.

I am the very last person that Molly will turn to.  She likes me okay but there is no way will she sit on my lap for any length of time and would never sleep with me if there is anyone else around to pick.  But, the house had only one human in it so she slept with me.  And this morning, around 8 she crawled up and woke me up.  Weird behaviour for her.  So I got up, used the loo, took some advil and walked around the corner to take the dogs out and stepped right into a big puddle.  Slipped.  Twisted my already sore freaking knee.  What the hell!!  She couldn't wait two minutes?  Now I am hobbling around with a stupid cane.  Dumb dogs!  See Jan, I don't like dogs!!!!!!   LOL!!  Although they aren't quite on my shovel list yet.

I am in PURPLE ROOM as we speak!!!!!  I got it pretty much set up.  I still have to hang my four seasons ladies, they are leaning on the wall right now and I have to get the right chair and I have to find my two pillows I bought in London...but its a good start.  In fact I am going to take a picture and post it.  Not sure how, the gadget I need to get it onto here isn't here...but I will figure it out.  TTYL

A WORK IN PROGRESS

I HATE MYSELF SOMETIMES

I have no class whatsoever.  I got up really early this morning, still dark out, to get ready for Shaw.  They could come as early as 8.  I pulled on my tights and black shirt, shoes and socks, stumbled out and made myself a coffee.

I ran around and made sure everything was ready for them and did some extra cleaning.  I booted poor Spod out of bed and we made beds and swept etc...

They finally arrived about ten thirty (wouldn’t you know) and I showed them around and they started to test the cables etc...A number of times they came in here where I am sitting on the edge of my chair, a table between my knees, typing away on my laptop to ask questions etc...

A while after they started to put in cables or what ever I went into my closet to start picking up the pieces of broken shelf.  We have a floor to ceiling mirror on the backmost wall.  As I worked I noticed something odd about my tights.  There seemed to be something white stuck to ...  well you know.  Toilet paper?  Did I sit in something?  Upon closer inspection I discovered I had put my tights on inside out and these particular tights have a white, a large, white gusset.  OH MY GOD!!  I had been running around this whole time with a white crotch displayed to the world.  What the hell is wrong with me?  I will never ever be that well turned out, made up, classic sixty year old beauty.  (shovel list) 

Last night Andrew took the dogs for their usual walk.  He drives to Thetis lake park where there are off leash trails.  Dinner would be at about 7:15.  So I got it all made and we waited, and waited so finally at about 7:45 we decided to go ahead and eat.  Just as we were finishing the phone rang.  It was Andrew telling me he was in some trouble.  Well immediately accidents, jail, injury flashes through my brain.  He quickly explained that when he got back to the park his car had been towed!  The sign says sunset to sundown, pretty ambiguous if you ask me.  Spod and I jumped into our car and roared off to the rescue.  I think he is going to fight it.  If the sign said 7 then fine, but it didn’t and sunset is always different.  He got back to his car by around 7.  Pretty expensive too.

Now its early in the morning.  I just got back from driving Andrew to get his car and Spod left at six to go back to North Van.  I am so impressed with him.  He got up at five and was away early for the ferry in Nanaimo.  What a guy.  I hope he will be okay.  I feel mean not going with him but there just isn’t anything for me to do there but twiddle my thumbs. 

 Yesterday was the first day of the listing and already there have been four showings.  Dane has decided to not take any offers until after the two open houses this weekend.  We’ll see.  I just can’t imagine the place selling that fast.  I just don’t think so.  Not to be a negative nancy or anything. 

We have no internet.  Yesterday when we got back from errands, after shaw spent hours here hooking everything up, I turned on my lappy here and voila! no internet.  I almost imploded.  I DO still have an “I Hate Shaw” page on my face book page.  I sat on the effing phone for over half an hour.  Long story short, they are coming back today at ten.  The installation guy hooked the modem up to a tv that is not compatible with it.  WTF!!!!!  They weren’t too happy with “steve” either.  Anyway  I am going to take some pics today and post them here.  It had better be working!

BLIND SPOD

It has been interesting not having a tv.  If anyone knows us they will know that we have a tv in EVERY room, all turned on at once and about as loud as it can get.

I spent many years alone raising my oldest two kids and I used to feel that the tv was a better husband than a real one.  It didn’t interfere with the child raising, it didn’t create laundry, it didn’t criticize every little move I made, it didn’t tell me what to do, it was way more interesting and intelligent than most real husbands.  So, I became very attached to my tv.

Fortunately for me Andrew had a big boom box set up on the wood stove.  It is tuned into a classic rock station and its been a blast listening to all the rocking oldies.  But I am ready now for some Gerry Springer, Dr. Phil or Judge Judy.

Spod finished the unit for the bedroom that is to hold the tv and its beautiful and perfect.  I love it.  It took him all the live long day and a few more re focusing tactics on my part, but he did it and it really is a lovely piece.  I can’t wait to have all five or six of them going at once!  

I was in the midst of unpacking all the clothes in the walk in.  I had the first rack on the right totally full to the gills.  I hung one last little blouse on it and the damned thing pulled off the wall spraying about forty items everywhere and the rack fell to a million pieces.  And this brings me to a sore subject between Spod and me.

I have been telling him for some time now he needs glasses...all the time glasses, not just Costco reading ones.  Many years ago, and I mean many, he did get a pair, bifocals, but they made him trip and miss stairs etc...which at first until you are used to them, they do.  But he didn’t wait for that..he just tossed them.  And thats okay when you are at the beginning of losing some of your focus.  

Jump to years and years later.  Now you are pretty blind without them and bifocals are a necessity.  You trip and miss steps for a whole different reason...you can’t frigging see!

Back to the closet...I took a closer look at the gyprock screws, you know those twisty things you hammer in first then screw the screw into it.  Well he screwed one of the screws into the gyprock BESIDE the gyprock screw. And now, on the floor, was a tangle of hangers and clothes and broken up shelf.  And the sad thing is that I had totally colour co ordinated that line of clothes.  I was going to take a picture and post it on Cookie’s wall.  She would have been so proud of me!  Well I think I hear Shaw out there.  TTYL

SPOD...HAHAHAHAHA...I LOVE HIM!!!

We are in Victoria.  Bill is heading back to N. Van tomorrow for another load and do some yard work...but...right now he is building a unit for our bedroom and we need it by tomorrow before shaw comes.  We need it to put the tv on.

But...do you think he can just focus and do the building and get it done?  Why no he can’t!  It is so funny watching him.  He is like a two year old...he sees something shiny and, like a zombie, arms out, waddles over, picks it up and decides to hang it, or fix it, or set it up somewhere or whatever.

I am in the bedroom unpacking a zillion boxes, making room for the unit.  Now and then I come out and check.  He is never at the stuff on the floor building.  He is off figuring out where to hang the key hook thingy..it happened to be sitting on a little table within his sight.  The next time he was winding up all the electrical cords that I had put on the counter in the kitchen...to do later Spod, later!  Next time he was wandering around picking up pieces of cardboard and folding neatly all the packing paper..  Next time he was gone.  He was downstairs looking through files.  So now I am staying here in the living room keeping an eye on him.  I figure when he gets into the groove of the building I will be able to safely leave him!!  Hahahaha!  And he will build it beautifully in the end and thats what counts.

We had a mixed time in Vancouver.  I had typed out a whole blog post about the last two days and then hit the wrong button and lost it all.  So the short version is my birthday dinner at Aryn’s  and Bradley’s was awesome!  We had steamed mussels in garlic and wine, baguette, delicious juicy garlicky chicken, roasted veggies including parsnips...which almost made me cry they so reminded me of my dad who loved them so and the best risotto we have ever eaten.  Then for dessert we had lemon tart (thank you April!) and home made brownies.  Mmmmmm!  And then we had the best time sitting around the table laughing and arguing and talking and drinking lovely wine.  Could not have been better.

Yesterday I was really cranky and not much fun to be around.  I hate those little details in a finished house.  I simply don’t want to be there anymore and I let it get to me.  I think I behaved badly and I do believe they were all glad to see the back of me when we left.  We got home here around 11 last night.

Oops there goes Spod.  He has decided to go make a develled egg sandwich and this is exactly what he just said as he is talking to himself...”It will help me focus.”  Hahaha...go Spod!!  I will let you know how it goes.  In fact this time I will take pics and try to post.  If there are no pics it will be because of the sketchy wifi.  But this time tomorrow I will definitely have super internet and be able to post pics with my posts.  I always feel the pics make up for the crappy entries.  Or maybe its the other way around.  LOL!!  Whatevs.....TTYL

ASHAMED AND EMBARRASSED

At the moment I am sitting on the ferry once again, heading to North Vancouver.  It is going to be a long trip...the fog is slowing us down to a crawl.

We had such a nice day yesterday.  I got to stay at home and not get properly dressed and putter about.  Spod and I built a closet system we bought at Ikea for our walk in, in our bedroom.  It turned out fantastically!  And I started to unpack suitcases and boxes.  Such a good feeling.

Andrew was home for a good part of the day and we had some wonderful visits.  I really like him.  He is such an honourable person and very funny!  And our dogs are so attached to him I am almost jealous....almost but not really.

The house in North Van is almost done!!!  Everything except the yard will be done by tonight.  Dane will be in tomorrow to get the pictures for the MLS listing and I am not coming over to N. Van again til it sells.  I just want to stay at home.  I think I could be a really good agoraphobe!  

Tonight we are going to Brad and Aryn’s for dinner for my birthday!  The food will be awesome...they are such good cooks.

  We are heading home tomorrow via Richmond Ikea then to Tswaassen.  There is always one more thing one needs from that ridiculous store.  And I am NOT talking about the two cent hot dogs they sell.  Spod is insisting on buying the ‘correct’ thingys you push into the holes on the shelf unit to set the shelves on.  Jeez....I just get cheap chopsticks, or twigs off a bush and push those in the holes..works for me.  I think we need another coat hangery thing for the front door coat closet too.  I must admit that Ikea does have a solution for EVERYTHING!!!

So now we are almost docking in Horseshoe Bay.  The fog is as thick as pea soup out there so its hard to tell...but we have been on this boat for two hours now so we should be getting close.  I shall report tomorrow when we get home how the birthday dinner went tonight.  I will get pics and hopefully the internet will let me post them.  TTYL

PS:  I have something really embarrassing to admit to here.  Very reluctantly but I am choosing to use this experience as a learning tool.  And maybe Cookie, you shouldn’t read past this point.  I am ashamed.

I arranged for a cleaning crew of three to come in today to clean my house.  Three hours at 150 per hour, and I agreed to an extra hour if necessary.  So they arrived and they started and at the 3 hour mark the leader of the crew came to me.  And she said that there was no way was this house going to get clean by the three of them in under four hours.  In fact, they would need several more hours with an added three people.  Oh My God.  So, we ended up with 3 people for four hours and six people for  an additional five hours.  And those additional hours are double.  My house was that dirty.  THAT DIRTY!!!  Never again.  I am going to have a housekeeper in the new house.  This cannot happen ever again.  And the worst part? I didn’t even see it.  :(

SEE JAN???  THIS IS WHY I DON'T LIKE DOGS.  ANDREW SENT THIS TO ME.  HE WENT HOME TO CHECK THE DOGS AND THIS IS WHAT THEY HAD DONE.  BAD DOGS!

ANOTHER GHASTLY DINNER

I shall get to the dinner in a minute.  Yesterday was pretty frustrating.  Our house is being listed on Monday and photographed on Tuesday.  But, there is so much to do yet.  The light in the dining room has to be changed, the living room and hallway floors have to be polished, the light on the stove needs fixing, the electrician needs to run cables and change boxes, lots of painting yet to do, new carpet to go in on the stairs, all the windows washed and a cleaning crew to spend four hours cleaning the place.  All by Monday evening.  I think I shall pull a Scarlett O’Hara and just not think about any of it til next week.

We spent the day at the house over there then got the three ferry to Nanaimo.  I packed all those last minute things like my favourite garbage can, bathroom scale, the keurig that works (we have one here that over thinks the whole coffee making process and takes five silly minutes to make one cup), lamps, hat boxes, a certain lily from the back yard etc...

 I thought Elliott (our reno guy) was going to be there so I started the self clean thing on the stove.  Well that takes four hours and we had to leave in two.  Elliott didn’t come and we had to leave a 700 degree stove cooking away in the middle of the kitchen floor.  We don’t need another house to burn down!  But it didn’t.

Now to the dinner.  Monte had decided to bring Parker (bad dog) back and to bring our red dry sink (from Bamfield, Kevin had it and I took it back when they moved so it was being stored at Monte’s).  We agreed to meet in Nanaimo at Swiss Chalet for dinner then tandem down to Victoria.

We ordered our usual food at around five after five.  Our appies arrived quickly and as quickly got devoured.  Then we waited, and waited and waited.  Finally at quarter past six I very crankily asked our overly zealous happy happy (lying) waitress, who kept saying “It will just be a minute!!” in a loud sing song voice. (shovel list) “Where is our food?”  She said something about “they forgot to put the fries in” in a shouty lying tone and sailed off.  At six thirty we finally got our dinner.

The chicken was good, the salad okay, the veggies not cooked and the bun, which is usually the best part, was coldish and MOULDY!!  I took a bite and almost gagged.  I hate the taste of the mould you get on bread.  And I remember that the last time we were in this same SC it was a long long loooong wait.  So that was two dinners in a row that were a bust.

And if anyone tells you that its only an hour from Nanaimo to Victoria, they would be lying.  It took FOREVER!!!  And there was no traffic.  I thought we would never get here.  But we did and it felt so good to be back.  We were all in bed by ten and sound asleep.  We heard Andrew get home some time in the night, poor guy, he works crazy hours.

  Now its morning and Spod is dicking around with a smoke alarm, which he keeps setting off.  Its freaking Parker out (which is not a bad thing, rotten dog) and probably waking the boys downstairs. 

We bought a closet system at Ikea and it needs building.  This will entail shit exploded all over the dining/living room, many “For Christ Sakes!!!” (I cleaned that expression up...I can’t print what he will really be saying) and me down on the floor over and over picking up things he drops and “can’t see’.  But in the end it will be built and placed in the closet and filled with all our worldly goods.  Should be a fun day.  If I don’t ever post again its because we have killed each other.  TTYL (hopefully)

I REALLY JUST WANT TO GO HOME

As my facebook friends maybe saw yesterday, I was presumed to be homeless.  And that is almost my most dearest wish.  Being a bag lady with a shopping cart has secretly been a fantasy of mine for years.  Just think....no stuff to worry about, no house to clean, no bathing or hair washing, probably lose weight due to lack of food,  all plus pluses I think.

But in the meantime, in the world of reality, I am having to juggle four houses in my brain.  Port Alberni, Victoria, North Vancouver and Maui.  They all need to have bills paid, maintenance arranged, work to be done....I just want a lovely motor home and drive from town to town, park, put my feet up, drink coffee...and when I am tired of the scene out the window, pull up stakes and move on to the next spot.  It sounds like absolute heaven.  The first place I would ramble around in would be Alaska again.  One can dream.

I am sitting on the bed in the motel.  I am procrastinating.  I do not want to go back to the house.  And whats more I do believe I will need to come back on Monday.  The listing becomes active on Monday evening.  Photographers are coming in on Tuesday.  And at the moment so much is still being done so I need to come back and fine tune and then leave it to April to maintain.  

After my hair appointment yesterday I came back to the hotel room to do my hair (dry and put into a poof...takes forever to dry).  We met Aryn and Bradley last night for dinner at Earls.  We had a lovely time with B&A but an awful awful dinner. Spod and Aryn's halibut was tough, dry and not tasty.  My salmon was really good but it was on a bed of lentils and black somethingorother and it was stone cold.  Its funny, eveytime we go there we see famous people.  What gives!!??  Its not that great a place.  We will go to Denny's next time...way better food!

Well enough of this.  I really must head off.  We have reservations on the 3 ferry.  We are meeting Monte for dinner in Nanaimo and then he is following us home.  He took Parker with him home and I guess he has done nothing but crap and wee and claw the blinds and gouge the wall beside his door since he got there.  Stupid dog.  See Jan? I told you I don't like dogs!!!  I just like other people's dogs..LOL!! TTYL

POST MOVE...PRE LISTING

I knew I didn’t like coming back to the house you have moved from.  Its depressing and always so much work.  I can’t believe how much there is to deal with.

Yesterday I:  arranged with hydro for the new house, arranged with telus to get a phone, paid so many bills that had built up while we were gone, added new bills (like water, sewer etc) to my bank bill paying thingy, arranged for cleaners to come in on Monday, arranged for window cleaners, arranged for an electrician to fix one of the breaker boxes (over 1,000 bucks),  did all my internet/email stuff cuz I had a good wifi connection and on and on and on.

I went to my doctor and got myself one years worth of prescriptions!  I love my dr.  He isn’t invasive like some (like taking blood pressure or ordering blood sugar lab work)  In other words I can push him around.  My kind of doctor.   We met with the real estate agent.  Now that was funny.

He is a very very good looking, very well turned out, extremely well dressed, natty young man.  He is married to a very beautiful woman and has two of the most perfect beautiful babies you ever saw.  I am pretty sure he lives in the perfect house, completely organized and always always sparkly clean.  And then this lovely man, whom I like very much, comes to our house.  Sigh.

And this brings me to another point.  We have dealt with a number of well turned out real estate agents over the years.  They all, every one, are never happy with how uncluttered your house is, or how clean, or how fixed up.  I am of the opinion that even if the house were actually perfect they would find something that isn’t quite right.

Our house right now is basically empty, at least compared to houses where the seller is still living in it.  There is an exercise bike in the living room.  Thats it.  There is a small stack of April’s paintings on the floor in Monte’s old bedroom.  There is NOTHING in our bedroom.  ETc....So Dane is looking around and we go into Monte’s old room and he freezes, stares at the offending tiny pile of pics and lifts his brows and goes “These?”  “They are April’s.  There isn’t anywhere for them to go.”  He says nothing.  I am thinking...”Holy Crap, one month ago there was a giant sagging bed, a huge filing cabinet and a whole cheap ass wall unit from Ikea.”  We go into our bedroom and he spies a broken baseboard and freezes...”This?”  “Yeah Yeah...its going to be fixed when the painters come.”  Never mind that the room was spectacularly empty, uncluttered and echoey.  Into Purple Room, where April actually has moved into, the only room plus kitchen that she is using.  She moved the couch and dresser into the middle of the room so the painters can cover them.  “These will be taken out and gone, yes?”  “No Dane, April is LIVING here.  For a house with someone LIVING here, do you not think it is in pretty empty uncluttered shape? Yes?”  What the hell!

But then we hit the garage, which I had warned him there was some stuff to still be taken out by us...today.  Aprils animals are in there.  A guinea pig in a cage, on top of that is a rabbit in a cage, and on top of that is a hamster in a cage.  

He walks in there, spies the animals, freezes, looks at me, raises eyebrows, and “These?”  “They are April’s.  They will be here until she moves..so yes, these will be here.”  Sad little imperceptible shake of head.

I reminded him that if someone wants the house they will not care if there is a couch in ONE room of this whole house!  When we first looked at the house we wanted in Victoria, it was full to the gills with furniture, wall units full of crap,  shitty awful floors and a bearded dragon and iguana sitting there.  I didn’t care.  I loved the house and bought it.  I think once we get the house painted and cleaned it will all be fine.  Maybe.

Last night I met with one of Monte’s friend’s mom.  I have known Allison since our boys became friends when they were four years old.  We don’t see each other nearly often enough and we spent three hours catching up last night at JJ Bean.  So good to see her and find out all the doings of our boys and our families.  I shall be putting her on my list of things to do when we come back to North Vancouver for all our appointments etc!  Really really enjoyed it.

So now its time to hit the ground running.  I have a hair appointment at 11 and there is still so much to be done.  TTYL

TWO POSTS TODAY...I FORGOT TO POST LAST NIGHT! (and this one won't post...stupid internet

I forgot to post last night so there will be two today!

We are going back to north van today til friday.  There's a lot of loose ends, cleaning (shovel list) and appointments to go to.  So, I shall have to make this quick.

I tried to post some pics on the last post but our internet is so bad it just wouldn't happen.  We are going to call shaw back as soon as we are permanently here next week.

We had a great post Thanksgiving Day yesterday! We ate leftovers, which in my opinion is better than the actual dinner, certainly a whole lot less work!, dug through a few more boxes, Spod planted hundreds of daffodils (no tulips, deer eat the bulbs) and then at two we took off to go explore.

We ended up in Port Renfrew...the other end of The West Coast Trail from Bamfield.  Holy hannah its a long long way away, especially when you are crammed in the back seat with two giant slobbering dogs and one little half blind whiney one!

But the trip was well worth it.  At this time of the year it is extra beautiful out there.  Its just so flipping exciting to have so much new territory to explore.  My poor facebook friends and eventually (when the internet is fixed) you readers here are going to be inundated with useless pictures.  Its already started..I posted a bunch on facebook already.

We didn't get home until 8:30 last night.  Port Renfrew is miles and miles away.  We came home by cutting across to Cowichan Lake, Duncan and down the Malahat.  We went up there through Sooke.  At Port Renfrew we found a wee store that was open and went in and bought fifty dollars worth of mystery meat, spam, buns, ritz, cheezies, hot rods with cheese, sandwiches and water.  Mmmmm...good truck dinner!

We hadn't locked the house.  Totally not necessary here in this neighbourhood but Andrew is really really particular about locking everything up, even when we are home.  So out of respect for him, I felt really bad and truly wanted to beat him home.  He had gone to Keats for the weekend.  The poor guy probably would have freaked.  (His mommy reads this blog sometimes...don't tell him!!!  LOL!!)  It won't happen again I promise!
He got home a wee while after us but he was so tired he went straight downstairs and we didn't see him again!

Now I am going to clean and pack up for the few days in North Van.  Bill has to take all the garbage to the garbage place here.  I think we are going to go the Tsawassen route this time, try something different.  We always go the Nanaimo way.  So I am going to close this off for now.  I will try to post again tomorrow morning!  TTYL

MMMMM....TURKEY

I see on Facebook that most of you all out there had a lovely thanksgiving day and turkey!  I was looking at Spod's brother Frank and wife Joan's pictures.  Their food looked amazing and I can't believe how big their grandchildren are getting.  I think it is time we all get together again and check each other out!

We had a great day yesterday.  I managed to unpack most of what I need in the kitchen.  But there will be no more unpacking anywhere else until closet systems are in.  We also need to find a couple of pieces of furniture.  But that can wait.  I am in no rush.

After I finished my post yesterday I started in on making dinner.  It felt good to be cooking properly again and this kitchen is pretty awesome.  It is definitely a one step kitchen at the moment.

Later in the morning the three of us managed to get the two armchairs upstairs, with the use of the garden wagon.  We simply could not get the couch.  It was way heavier than I thought.  I was pretty useless and Spod can't lift either so it will have to wait until there are able bodied peeps around.

What a difference having the two chairs up here makes though.  Way more homey and settled.  Now I have to get Shaw back to hook up the tv's.  And they better fix this internet.  I have the guy on speed dial and I will definitely be using it if the net doesn't get better than it is now.

Turkey, stuffing, mashed spuds, gravy, peas/carrots, candied yams, brussel sprouts, pickled beets, pickles, cranberry sauce and pumpkin pie.  How predictable is that for a thanksgiving dinner?  And as usual I made a ton.  I made a giant plate up to take to April, leftovers for Monte to take home, enough to eat all day today should we wish and a frozen turkey shepherd's pie in the freezer.  I remind me of my auntie Iris...she used to make big turkey dinners and then make a bunch of different meals out of it.  "Cook once, eat ten times!"

I am going to go around and take some pics today of this messy unpacked house and post them here. I think my biggest job in the coming months will be to keep the yard clean and devoid of junk.  Spod just can't seem to help himself.  I mentioned yesterday to Monte that he is like Stanford, from Sanford and Sons.  Monte responded, "who?"  Jeez...younguns!!!

No pics...sorry!  ttyl

SIGH!

I am trying so hard to get motivated..to no avail.  I sort of moped around yesterday and diddled with this and diddled with that.

  I remember years ago when I moved from Kamloops to Van.  I had loaded the largest budget truck you could rent, right to the gills.  My girlfriend and I did it all in one afternoon...including a freezer and a piano.  I packed in a ten yr old Aryn and 12 yr old Kevin, mom's dog Rachel (we were dog sitting) and early early in the morning we took off through the canyon.  We had to stop at every single town to gas that guzzler up. (they reimbursed me later).  

We arrived in Burnaby just before noon.  The men I had arranged to meet me...didn't show up! We had to return that truck that afternoon or be charged even more money.  So I started to unload the boxes, handing them to those two kids and telling them which part of the house to put it in.  Then we unloaded the furniture, all of it between the three of us.  Finally we were down to only the piano.  I had phoned some other guys from an ad in the classifieds and they showed up around four and put the piano in the basement.

We then unpacked, set up bedrooms, set up living room, the kitchen was already partially set up from me camping out there so the kitchen didn't take long.  I then made dinner and Kathy and Kerry came over around six and we had dinner.  Okay I am now tired just writing about that.  Those days are long long gone.  If it hadn't been for those two little kids I am not sure what I would have done.  We even unloaded the freezer.

I did get some kitchen boxes unpacked here but I can see that a lot of boxes are going to stay packed and in the garage.  But the garage is so full we can hardly function in there.  I just simply have nowhere to put all that stuff.  All our cupboards have absolutely nothing in them, no poles for hanging stuff, no shelves, no nuttin', because of painting.  We will be putting in closet systems but that is going to take a while. 

 But....I did sort of come up with an idea yesterday whilst we were solving other problems...like they don't have garbage pick up in Langford.  You have to hire a private company and upon research the cheapest we could find was 5.50 per garbage bag.  That might seem okay to most of you but this family, even with recycling everything, we have like ten garbage bags a week.  We took a whole truckload of garbage to that place yesterday and unloaded to all the right bins and places,  25 bucks.  I think we will be doing that each week...upside of that is there won't be the dreaded night before garbage day with Spod.  But..back to my idea....

I originally was going to make the main living area downstairs and keep the upstairs just for 'nice'.  So all the ratty furniture from our last living room went downstairs.  But it isn't feeling right.  At least not for right now.  We won't be doing the upstairs living room, or kitchen or whatever until the other house sells and spring comes.  So I think we will move that furniture upstairs and just be up here for the winter.  Of course that means that a fat old broad with a sore hip, Spod (need I say more) and a giant boy with bad bad feet have to move a couch and two armchairs upstairs.  But I feel good about this.  Its making me feel a little more motivated this morning.

Its turkey day today!  I made sure to unpack enough of the kitchen, all the important stuff, so I could make a turkey dinner.  Monte brought the turkey, a nice easy ten pounder and after dumping yesterday we sallied forth and got the right bread for stuffing from superstore and all the things necessary for a thanksgiving dinner.  So soon the house will smell good and we will have our old comfy couch and chairs up here with us.  All is good!  Have a lovely thanksgiving all of you and I hate to get maudlin here (shovel list) but lets take a moment and think about all those peeps out there that don't have this amazing opportunity to eat turkey with a family.  I love turkey and I love my family:)  TTYL

BOXES BOXES EVERYWHERE

I think I am in shock.  It is 7 pm and I am sitting at the kitchen table surrounded by a million boxes, dirty kitchen, internet that goes in and out like a moon flying through broken clouds.  Thus I am back to using my word processor ‘bean’.  I will copy and paste when the internet is deciding to co operate.

We got over here yesterday right at supper to be greeted by Aryn, who, not only painting our house, also did all the bedding and made the beds (the guest twin beds downstairs) all ready for us.  She also cleaned the house.  I was so so grateful.  And this house looked so amazing..all a delicious vanilla warm cream colour.  The flooring downstairs is miraculous.  It IS laminate but seriously...you would never know.  This place is just so homey.  Oma would have loved it!  We sat around the table (Andrew was there too...so good to see him and he is looking fantastic..loving his new job) and had dinner and wine and laughter.  Was such a wonderful welcome.

This morning I was in for a rude rude shock.  Spod had brought a few truckloads of stuff from the sheds and garage before we left on our trip, with explicit instructions from me to keep it all on the workbench side of the garage.  I needed a clear garage to accommodate all the boxes coming our way this morning.   And yes, you can guess....it was absolutely everywhere all over the garage.  I was shocked and horrified!  And very very pissed off.  So I started to simply pick up every single thing and put it over where it belonged.  It was a long, heavy, dirty f...ing job, fueled by buckets of pissed off.  And in the nick of time I got the job done...as the truck pulled up.

They unloaded lickety split and before you knew it they were leaving and I hit that wall that can only be caused by jet lag.  I still can’t seem to get past 2 or 3 in the afternoon without losing my spine and just simply wanting to go  to sleep.  Monte came down today so he and Spod went off to Costco and I went to bed.  I don’t think I am going to unpack any more tonight.  Not only too tired but my hip hurts like hell.  I do have to go hunt for sheets...can’t find them.  I shall post another entry tomorrow when I am not so discombobulated!  TTYL

D-DAY

Well this is it!!!  It is four in the morning, the house is asleep and its all dark.  I am taking a moment to consciously take in the fact that this is our very last night ever in this house, and living with April, and being a resident of Vancouver Metropolis.  I don't think its going to really hit me until we are completely moved and not coming back here to clean, or do business etc...

I do believe we are pretty much ready, except for: we buried a filing cabinet in Monte's room where all the boxes are...it will rapidly have to be emptied into boxes as soon as it appears in there.  And the closet has about ten full garbage bags of my skinny clothes (shovel list...should just donate them) and they have to be boxed as well.  Spod told me the shed was completely empty except for a couple things that would go in our truck.  I took a look and I was shocked then pissed off....its half full.  I do believe he will be making trips back here over the next while...BY HIMSELF.  Once I am done next week, I will be DONE.  Other than hair appts. or doctor, I ain't coming back!!!

And now I have just realized I have packed every single piece of clothing I own.  Every single piece.  I have no clothes to wear today.  DAMN!!  I am going to have to go find the right frigging box and dig out a shirt and pants.  I never got dressed yesterday so all I have are the pj's I have on.  So on that note I had best get cracking...I will post another entry as soon as the truck delivers our stuff tomorrow.  What a dolt I am.  TTYL

SOMETHING SAD

At least its super sad for me.  I thought I had transferred all my pics to my new laptop and told April to delete them on my old one to make room. She is taking over the old one.  She deleted.  And when I got home....I hadn't transferred them after all.  Stupid stupid stupid.  Fortunately I had them backed up to March 2011 and then I started to put them on my new big lappy Nov. 2012.  But eighteen months are down the tube.

It's funny how when you leave your home, go far far away, get busy with other things, like galloping through tunnels holding your ass...you simply forget things or remember things that just didn't happen or did happen.  I simply do not know how I thought I had transferred the pics.  And...I put what I did have on an external drive onto the computer last night...it took 2 and a half hours but do you think I can find them now?  Man its annoying when you aren't a whiz bang brilliant computer nerd.

Bill and I got up at 4am this morning and started to pack the bedroom up.   I didn't think there was that much to pack.  I completely emptied all drawers, cupboards and shelves before we left on our trip...but a few things built up and I pulled a ton out from under the bed.  It was all in containers we hadn't looked in since moving in here.  Needless to say it took several hours to get through all of that.  Its beginning to feel a little endless.  

Now its suppertime and I gotta tell you I am so tired I could cry.  And my hip hurts and my back hurts and I hate stuff (whine!).  The truck comes at eight tomorrow morning and there is still so much to do.  I can hear Spod (speed of dark..he loves the nickname) out there banging apart shelves, emptying file cabinets, collecting tools...he is like a slow energizer bunny.  Actually he is amazing, he just slowly but surely steadily gets it all done.

And now its time to make some supper, throw the final crap into a box and go to bed.  Gotta be up early tomorrow for sure....and no matter how tired I am right now, there's a big spark of excitement way down inside!  TTYL...from Victoria!!

HOME AGAIN HOME AGAIN, JIGGETY JIG

It is the middle of the night and I am wide awake, and worried.  But first, let me tell you it is sooooooo good to be home, even if the place is totally upside down!  I was so happy when the wheels touched down on that tarmac.

April was here at home when we got here, but no big warm welcome from our doggies.  Andrew has them in Victoria already.  He is still living at our house and will be til at least the end of October (thank goodness).

And....the main part of the house here is all painted and beautiful.  Aryn and Bradley did an absolutely beautiful job of not just the painting, but all the gyprock repairs etc...It really is remarkable what a good paint job can do....another good reason the dogs aren't here.  And apparently Parker has already lifted his leg and marked his territory on our brand new carpet on the stairs in Victoria.

And here is the worrying part.  It is simply mind boggling what must be done between now and Thursday morning.  Thank goodness we don't have to have the house completely empty and if there is anything not move ready on Thursday, we can leave it and get it over the next while in our truck.  But I am pretty sure there is about twenty boxes, big ones, that have to be bought, filled and marked.  And I have no clue where to put them, there just isn't room.  I had better buck up because there is no time for panicking.  I just have to come to terms with the fact that our lives are going to be completely chaotic and hard work for the next month.

Bill is going to go and meet with his buddies today, one of the last weekly visits :(.  I know that right now we have 'plans' to be coming back here frequently for doctor visits etc, but the reality is that that will come to a halt.  As much as it sucks, we will have to find a new doctor and a new pharmacist.  Oh well, our doc was getting up there in years and if anything really troublesome came up we would probably come back to him, but it isn't very realistic to hop on the ferry and book into the hotel just to get your blood checked.  But there will definitely be trips back and I know Bill will time them to include lunch with the "boys".  He enjoys those lunches so much.

I cannot find anything.  The box of packing stuff, like tape guns and markers etc.. is gone, three phones, a whole box of current clothes I wear is not in my room where I left it, the stool Bill uses on his side of the bed to climb in and out is gone, it takes two remote controls to run the bedroom tv and one of them is gone.    When I ask April where are these things, she just shrugs and says she doesn't know.  Its not like there are that many places for this stuff.  Hopefully stuff will show up as I pack. 

 One thing for sure, we are not going to unpack our suitcases.  And they won't be unpacked for a while.  We have to replace the shelving, and drawers etc...in all the closets in the new house.  The old ones weren't worth keeping so the kids hauled them out when they painted.  Off to Canadian Tire (shovel list..don't like CT) and look at new closet systems.  In the meantime we will be bending over and rooting through suitcases and boxes.

Let me just put a word in here about our kids.  Hopefully they will read this.  Aryn, Bradley, Monte and April...you guys have been invaluable. As we have gotten older (I know I like to complain about Bill and his ageing issues...but in some ways I am even worse, I reluctantly admit) it has become not as easy to just up and do things.  Without you guys with your dog care, painting, cleaning, running errands, reminding us of things, packing, getting food etc...we would be hooped.  So thank you and we love you.

And Bill....you are pretty amazing for an 80 year old.  I still depend on you for so much and you always deliver (at the speed of dark, mind you, lol!!) but you always get it done.  More than I can say for myself.

Okay, enough of all that.  I am jet lagged and getting maudlin (shovel list)!  TTYL

TOOOO MUCH TIME TOGETHER

Oh My God!!!  He is driving me crazy!!  Why can't he just be normal.  We have spent the entire last month together, not more than 20 feet apart.  Once in a blue moon we went to a store or something apart, but that would be only a few minutes.  And now we are driving each other crazy, but especially him driving me nuts.  I AM close to perfect after all!!!LOL!!

I can give examples:  All the way up in the elevator, we were alone, he starts to make pizzies (passing gas) ..toot toot....toot toot....toot toot...at any time the elevator could have stopped to let people on.  This just makes me so mad...you have no idea.

And have I mentioned he is sloooooooow...slow talking, slow thinking, slow walking, just plain slow?  Why I do believe I have mentioned this before...Mr. Speed of Dark.  My hip hurts when we walk that slow.  So what I do now is walk the normal speed (which is lightening fast compared to him) then stop.  I don't look, I don't move, I just stop.  Then when I hear him shuffle up I take off again.  And stop and do it all over.  We never ever walk beside each other.  Never.

And leaving the room is downright painful.  I lay around and read and blog and stare out the window and wait for him.  Then when he is all ready I get up grab my stuff and head out the door, only to hear him say "oh I need my cane.  I need my glasses, and I need my wallet" or whatever.  And that folks is another good five minutes to accomplish.

Today he finally said he was ready so I headed to the door and holy crow! he was there and ready.  So off we go, get on the elevator and on the way down he says, "Oh I forgot my glasses and Oh I didn't put my hearing aids in."  WHAT THE HELL!!!!!  So I pulled out my room card, stuck it in the security slot, pushed 5 (our floor) and went right back up.  Into the room and I went straight over to the bed and picked up my book and started reading.  I got a chapter read before we were heading back out the door.

And, god forbid, he likes the echoey sound in the bathroom.  Almost every time he is in there, he leaves the door open (shovel list) and he makes noises.  He boop boops, he sings, he growls, he hums...he LIKES the sounds.  And when we watch tv he imitates the accents, or certain words or for sure if anyone laughs.  He is like a freaking parrot.  I swear he has turettes.  

And I don't even have to mention again the sneezing, coughing, harrumphing, nose blowing, spitting (shovel list), nail clipping, pizzying......'sigh'.

I think its time for this trip to be over.  We are now fighting (or at least I am), my patience is gone, I am tired of repeating everything, I am tired of his stupid sarcastic remarks, I am done.  And I know for a fact that I am equally driving him nuts, and hurting his feelings, and making him mad.  Its too bad really because in between all that crap we have a fantastic time together.  He can be so funny and he is also very loving..but he still drives me nuts!!!  Tomorrow we will be home by noon.  TTYL
(if you are reading this Bill...I do actually love you up to the sky....we just need a break!!!   LOL!!!)

ONE MORE SLEEP

Whew!  One more sleep!  Thank God our plane leaves pretty early tomorrow.  We are being picked up here at the hotel at 6 in the morning.  And..because we are flying Air Canada, we will be in my favourite terminal out there...3.  Its the old original main terminal and so easy to use and shop etc...

Yesterday we left the room really late again.  We lay around here, go on our laptops and argue about what we are going to do.  The one thing we did agree on was going into China Town and finding dim sum.  We wandered and wandered and finally chose a place and it was good...and fun.  Dim sum is always a fun meal, as long as you don't  accidentally end up with chicken feet or duck tongues or some such. 

Later we went into the National Portrait Gallery gift shop right behind our hotel.  I love Gallery and museum gift shops...they have the best stuff and I did a little Christmas shopping.  I also bought two beautiful cushions for my new purple room.  And now I have to figure out how to pack them.

We found a Wagamamas.  An open one.  It was right beside our hotel...and I mean right beside.  Their signs are so little and hard to see.  So in we went last night and had our chilli beef noodle soup.  So funny because we had tromped around all over the place looking for one.  I finally googled it and couldn't believe it when it showed one right beside us, I can practically see it out our window.

After we went to the movies again.  We are the Millers....sooooo funny!  Well worth going to.  After we bashed and beat our way over to a restaurant for a 'lite bite'.  I tell ya, if suddenly all cell phones disappeared things would go so much more smoothly, kind of like when there is a bus strike, the traffic moves so much more smoothly.  There are people absolutely everywhere, standing in the middle of everything, staring at their phones.   It was already bad ten years ago, now its ridiculous.  We have raised a generation of addicts and connection freakoids.

Our lite bite last nite, (sounds like a song), was a goat cheese on fresh salad makings, covered with a fig dressing salad, accompanied by warm garlic bread and a corona.  Mmmmmmm....so good.  But whilst we were there (it is a steak house) we noticed that they were doing something that seems a trend here.  You order a steak.  They bring it on a very hot flat iron pan on a wooden tray.  The steak is like a small roast.  You then cut your little roast up and cook it on the hot iron to your liking and the whole thing is accompanied with a little pot of butter that you melt over the top.  They don't just eat plain steak here...it is always accompanied by butter at the least, bernaise, peppercorn or béchamel sauces or cheeses.  

So now we must haul ourselves out of our comfy bed, get dressed and head off to Camden market.  We will lunch there, take the canal boat back to Paddington, tube back to the hotel, wash my hair (shovel list), pack our suitcases (yay!!!) and go out for one last evening.  Its been an amazing trip!  TTYL

TWO MORE DAYS...WANNA GO HOME NOW

It was a long walky day yesterday.  We hopped onto the tube and zotted up to Oxford street.  We walked/shopped all the way down to Selfridges and back to Oxford Circus.

I managed to find some great boots, a step up from the uggs I wear ALL the time, more out of laziness than anything.  And!   I went into an HMV...(music/video) store and found something I have been looking for for years.  Did any of you see the series from BBC called "Tenko"?  It was about the prisoner women in the Chiangmai prison in Singapore.  Tenko is the Japanese word for the polite bowing you do when you meet up with a Japanese person.  This series was so memorable and it was shown way back in the early 80's so I hadn't held out much hope...but they had the complete series, so I am stoked.  

We stopped at Selfridges for lunch, kind of a tradition for us now.  They have a looooong moving sushi bar with the best sushi ever.   We met some people there and visited.  Twas fun.

By the time we got back to our hotel we just had time to rest a few minutes and get dressed and head out for dinner and a show.  We found a chain restaurant that served up a pretty good salmon and veg dinner and then off to the Bodyguard.

The show was pretty good.  The singing was phenomenal...the acting not so much...I think they could do a lot better with the lead actor.  In fact I am going to go find some reviews and see what they have to say.  It floors me that they can pretty much fill these theatres night after night for years on end.  I think we are maybe going to try to see one more show.  My choice is The Phantom...again.  I love that show.

Soooooo, now we are lazing about in the hotel room.  I am trying to convince Bill to put some clothes on.  We are at that age and stage of fat, or as in Bill's case ex-fat (he has gone the way his mom did...lost weight no matter what he eats, getting small) that we should NOT be walking around nekkid.  Hahaha!!  

I do believe that we are scrapping the Nottinghill Portobello Road market idea...its raining and miserable out.  Instead I think we will go to Chinatown, which is nearby, and have a mid day meal of dim sum and then do some April shopping.  I asked both Monte and April (I don't ask Aryn cuz she always says nothing) what they would like from England.  April sent a lovely long list and Monte said he didn't know.  Polar opposites!

Time to start this day.  Almost done and am really ready to go home.  TTYL

HUMILIATION AT ITS FINEST

Well another easy going day today.  I looked up Fat Lady Stores and found one that was within walking distance from the hotel.  I see a lot of very large British ladies in really nice stuff so I thought it was worth a try.

Yeah, well that didn't go so well.  Talk about humiliating.  The place was tiny, dead silent and the cheapest thing in there was about 200 pounds, thats four hundred in real money.  And, the stuff was soooo ugly and not me. 

 Speaking of which, the two sales ladies were dressed head to toe in couture clothing, they being skinny and skeletal (shovel list...skinny sales people in fat people stores).  I felt like a fat country bumpkin that fell off a turnip truck.  I   DID NOT BELONG IN THAT TINY PERFECT STORE.  I should have cut my losses and spun around and left.  But being the polite meek Canadian that I am, I didn't.

One of the sticks stepped forward and offered to help me find exactly what I was looking for.  So, long story short, amongst all those expensive awful clothes I did agree to try a couple of things on.

The first item was what appeared to be a fairly reasonable looking (at least on the hanger) coaty jackety type thing.  So I tried it on.  Um hum....it fit, but Bill, who was sitting in the one chair in the place, kind of loudly and not very nicely pointed out I looked like a bat.  So I looked in the mirror and as usual from front it was not too too bad but the moment I moved and turned sideways I turned into a bat...a pregnant one.  Next!

I swapped the bat coat out for a rather gothic long shiny black parachute material coat.  I kind of liked it so I put it on with a wee bit more enthusiasm.  I should have known better.  Every foot or so it had a drawstring option that completely encircled the coat, starting at the empire waste.  The coat went right down to my ankles, but at just below the knee level, for some reason the coat went out to a point then back in..like having triangles down there.  What???  It looked totally ridiculous and not only that the stupid thing was 795 pounds!!!!! 

 And all the while I am trying these two things on, one of the sticks kept holding up hideous sweaters and long sleeved tunics and wool dresses and I had to keep saying no, not me, no I never wear things like that, no no, that would be too hot...I finally asked if they had anything that wasn't wool and long sleeved.  Freeze, stare, nose lifts a fraction and in a very snide jokey kind of tone, "Well it is winter collection after all."  At that point I did cut my losses and told them that they really did NOT have anything in there that caught my fancy.  They gave each other a 'knowing' look and I called Bill and said come on.  We left.  I am not looking for the other one I found online.

Next we wandered back to the hotel, stopping now and then for coffee.  When we got back to our room I filled the big giant tub hot soapy water and had a good soak.  It must have worked because I felt much better after.  Bill went down below and bought tickets for The Bodyguard for tomorrow night.  Not necessarily my pick but he was very taken with the movie so he will enjoy it for sure and I am pretty sure I will too once we are there.

Tonite we went and had dinner in Chinatown then went to the movie The Heat with Sandra Bullock and Melissa MacCarthy.  Soooo funny.  Now to bed.  Tomorrow I am determined to find boots.  Don't need an over priced, snooty fat lady store for those.  TTYL

FINALLY..OFF THAT BOAT AND INTO LONDON

It feels so good to be off that ship.  It was just too long with way too many at sea days.  Getting off was a loooong painful process but our driver met us, an awesome guy, and drove us right downtown London to our hotel...and its a lovely one I must say.

The very first thing we did was dump our luggage and walk across Leister Square and right into an Angus Steakhouse.  We ordered the 10 oz steak and salad and jacket (baked) potato with sour cream.  SOOOOO  good!!!!!!!!!  

We walked about for a while, found a half price (total bull shit) ticket sales booth and bought tickets to see Jersey Boys last night.  Its the story of Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons.  It was pretty good...the music was fantastic.  Bill absolutely loved it.  It was over around ten thirty and we had a few blocks walk back to the hotel.  I could not get over how many people there were out and about.  We could hardly walk straight.

Just across the square, leading to the hotel, is a small half wall.  All along the way couples and random people were sitting on it.  As I walked I was looking at them and all the different things they were doing.  A couple were kissing, another couple were killing themselves laughing at a mobile phone they were looking at, another couple were in intense convo, another couple, she was crying and he was wiping her tears and then.....I saw a bit older couple, mid forties I would say.  He was straddling the wall and she...kind of fat, flouncy dress on, and dead butt ugly cow, was straddling him..and you could tell that they were DOING IT!!!  Right there in the square!!  And she was looking around, eye contact with everybody...what the hell??!!  Now I ain't no prude but that was grotesque.  In fact one woman, sailing past us because as you know..we go the speed of dark, glanced back to take a double take and said  "Oh God!  I didn't need to see that!"  Her friend told her she was just jealous.  Too bizarre...we went into the hotel and went to bed.

Now its morning and I am waiting for Bill.  If I had a nickel for every minute I have had to wait for him I would be a berjillionair.  Its raining out today so we are going to go get lunch at Wagamamas then go buy tickets to The Book of Mormon...looks like a good musical...getting rave reviews anyway.  Hopefully we won't be coughing our brains out like we both are right now.  Kennel cough...you always get it when you have been in close quarters with people for too long.  Jeez...now he is just sitting in a chair...GET YOUR SHOES ON!!!

I shall report back later!

The play was absolutely fantastic...soooo funny and clever.  We went to the matinee...which was great.  You get out at five and still have time to go do things.  Wagamama's was closed!  They seem to be doing a total refurbish on it.  So we popped into chinatown and found a cute little tucked away restaurant.  It had only three-four tables.  The food was totally delicious and quite different to what we normally eat.

Tomorrow...FAT LADY STORES!!!  I found two within a fairly close distance from here so we shall go and see.  Also the main store for Sketchers is right here too...covent gardens...so we shall drop in there as well.  TTYL