DUMB AIRPORTS

So now we are home and I have to admit that there is something of a downside to travel.  When we are having such a good time on our trip etc...one doesn’t let the negatives enter their minds...keeping up the happy times.  But........

One thing, not such a delicate subject, but your morning ablutions become evening ones...or afternoon....or anytime your poor confused system tries.  Soooooo inconvenient!  But the one that is the MOST annoying is the middle of the night one.  What the hell?  It just isn’t right sitting on the loo at three in the morning, bleary eyed, shivering and all confused.  Not right.

Another one is sleep...or the lack thereof.  Or weird sleep.  Nothing like laying in bed all night, and I mean ALL night with your eyes wide open, refusing to shut, and your brain zooming around into corners of your mind that you didn’t even want to know were there.  And then right around six in the morning you fall back asleep, dead, deep, out for the count, asleep.  The kind of sleep that you simply cannot function when roused and told to get dressed and go out into the city and walk for miles.  And then right in the middle of an important, very very expensive function of some sort your eyes roll up into your head, your head snaps forward and you drool, a long, very noticeable stream.  And god forbid you ride a bus.  Boom!  sound asleep!

Another one is hunger.  You get so violently hungry at the most inappropriate times.  Or, rather you can’t possibly eat a bite at the only time you are going to have to actually eat for a long time.  And whoever you are travelling with will be starving at the very moment you couldn’t possible swallow a bite.  So annoying!

When you are travelling in a country with a different language you can expect certain things will happen.  One thing that happened to us on a number of occasions was ordering food.  We were never sure what we were going to end up with, or two times, we ended up with nothing!  Not sure how that one happened.

And the grand daddy of them all, the trip home.  Poor April.  She had to put up with a very very annoyed and cranky mother on her trip home.  By the time we hit the airport I am done.  I just wanna be home and not in some ill thought out badly planned airport.  If I could be God for a day I would come down here and reorganize and replan all the airports in the world.  They ALL suck!

Yesterday, at the Montreal airport for example, we were sitting at gate A5.  Our actual gate had been changed yet again to A6 but there were no empty chairs there.  So we paid extra attention to what the little very Quebec accented attendant was saying over the microphone for gate 6.  But every time he made an announcement, a very loud general Air Canada announcement would blast through the whole airport totally obliterating anything our little guy was saying.  We totally missed the call for our row on the plane...in fact we were pretty much the last person on...and of course then there is no overhead room.  Grrrrrrr.....

By the time we had to walk the millions of miles in that airport, and spend freaking ages and ages in the longest security line you have ever seen (just as bad as the one we stood in, same airport, same security line, back on the mystery tour), my legs, feet, toes and back were on fire.  My backpack must have weighed a hundred pounds and my legs were charlie horsing. I could go on for ages about all the stupid things we ran into but I won’t.  Anyway, by the time we got on that plane I was in an awful stew and poor April was kind of shocked at how cranky I could get.  But, in my defence, I have paid some ugly consequences in the past when you don’t pay attention and things go south real quick.  I would love to just ‘wing it’ and have that oh well, ho hum attitude but past experience has shown me that shit can happen. 

Anyway, we got home safe and sound.  I spent the night on April’s and Myles’s couch and tonight I am going to be at Cookie’s.  The passport office is a no go...I need certain forms and have to mail it all away.  The IRS want the copy by Oct 3 but they will just have to wait.  And I am sure they will...they want my money.

TTYL