SURPRISING (AND USUSALLY STUPID) THINGS

I simply don't remember finding so many stupid or unexplainable things while packing up a house.  I have packed up thirteen houses in my lifetime.  Each one had its challenges (read babies or dogs or hoarder husbands). 

The biggest surprise in a past move was when we moved from North Van to Langford.  Bill made several trips by himself to Langford, taking stuff with him.  Stuff that we didn't want the movers doing....large huge mirror, tiffany lamps, breaky stuff.  I didn't really pay much attention to him as he already knew where stuff was to go.

My plan was for the movers to put a large majority of the boxes, the ones I could handle and lift, in the garage and as I did each room I would go and get those boxes and unpack.  That way the house wouldn't be full of boxes for us to constantly trip over.

On moving day Bill and I hightailed it to Langford.  I was so excited as I hadn't seen the house since we had bought it.  Well, the excitement didn't last long.  Bill had completely filled the garage with every stinking paint can, oil, dirty filthy boxes of a mish mash of past tools and equipment.  There must have been two hundred plant pots in there.  He had literally emptied our last garage into this one, and the last one was full of useless crap from as far back as when he lived with Kim.  I thought he was taking that shit to the dump!

So there went my plan for the boxes and seriously, the whole time I lived there that garage horror kept me awake on many a night.  After he died, and when I was packing that house up, I threw almost everything in that garage out.  I had a junk guy with a huge truck on speed dial.

So, naturally I kind of thought that this move would be easy peasy...no kids, no dogs, no hoarder husband, and as of a couple days ago, no musician and a million organs and pianos and boy junk.  Just me.  I am in control.  Oh yes!  Except....

For some odd reason I have come across twelve drawers, decorative boxes and small containers full of ridiculous junk.  I sorted them out.  I ended up with two large containers of pencils and pens and tape.  Two!  And this is a house where you can never find a pen or pencil when you need one.  And I found travel size pepto bismals....eight of them!  And I filled another plastic container with medications of one sort or another.  I found five watches...good ones.  All they need are batteries.  It seems when the batteries die I just go get another watch.  In one box there was one of those honeys shaped like a bear half full.  The other half had leaked out into the box, covering felt pens, receipts, pins, bobby pins, hair ponies, a million coins etc.....The whole thing got tossed.

But the one thing I found in all those junk containers that astounded and  puzzled me was a condom!  A condom!!!  Size large.  Seriously!!  I tell ya folks right here, right now...it sure as hell isn't mine!!!!!  There will be none of that ever again in my life...I cannot even imagine where that sucker came from.  I don't really want to speculate either.

There's another thing that I am packing, not from junk drawers, but definitely needing 'thought' packing.  That would be Mom, Bill and Parker.  I was going to put them in the same box but decided against it.  You never know, they could start plotting together!  So I separated them.

But I did come across three things that I hadn't forgotten about exactly but they surprised me.  If I hadn't found them hidden away for their own safety, I would have suddenly remembered them in the middle of a night down the road

APRIL PAINTED THIS FOR ME FOR MY SIXTIETH BIRTHDAY!

ARYN PAINTED THIS FOR BILL

ARYN PAINTED THIS FOR ME

and panicked, wondering where they were.  I shall post pics below.  They brought me to tears...good tears.

Well, gotta go...see what else I will find!!!  TTYL