ODE TO AMAZON

Armchair christmas shopping...you simply cannot beat it.  This is the fourth year that my goal is to not step into even one store to buy a gift.

I don't shop in stores anymore.  At least almost never.  I am not talking groceries here...although thats coming. On a rare occasion I do go into Winners but only when I am out of outrageous smelling hand soap.  They have an awesome selection.

I am going to digress here for a minute.  I will get back to the armchair shopping in a moment.

I was in Costco the other day.  I still buy toilet paper, paper towels, coffee etc... there.  As I walked along that first entrance aisle where the irresistible 'deals' are I spied something lovely.  It was a box with three hand pump soaps in it.  They were quite large...which is good if you like the smell, bad if you have to use a crappy smelling one for the next five years. They were really beautifully decorated.  So I read the flavours on them. They sounded so exotic and wonderful.  Thyme and mint....orange and rosemary...a lavender and something or other.  All acceptable smells to me. I bought them.

So I put one each in each of my three bathrooms.  I used the one in the main powder room first.  That was the thyme and mint.  I don't know if you have ever been in a cow barn when they spread the lime all over the floor, but thats what it smells like.  Seriously!  No thyme.  No mint.  Actually it smells a little like hippies and medicine.  Crap!!!

So I put the orange one upstairs in my bathroom.  I ran upstairs (no I didn't, I huffed upstairs) and dashed into the bathroom and pumped the soap...expecting the orange minty goodness.  And guess what?  It smelled like a cowbarn right after you spread lime all over the floor.  It smelled like hippies and medicine!  What the hell?  No orange and no mint, not even a hint.  Bastards. I didn't bother with the third one.  I am pretty sure there aint no lavender oder in it.

Any way back to the shopping.  So I have spent the last week or so sitting in my red recliner going through pages and pages of amazon suggestions and I have pretty much got it all done.  And I am so happy with my purchases.  And now the fun starts!  Every single day parcel after parcel arrives on my doorstep.  And pretty soon there will be a giant whine post about all the xmas wrapping I have to do now that Spod is gone. TTYL