purple room vents: DISCLAIMER: THIS IS ABSOLUTELY NOT A COMPLAINT

I am dead serious. This is NOT a complaint. I am about to point out all the ridiculous anomalies of this four and a half star resort. Everything, and I mean everything, is just a little off. It's like they put together a great idea that slid just a bit as it was completed. But without a doubt this has been by far the most interesting!!!

I am sitting right now at a small pedestal type table outside of their coffee shop. I have to keep a foot on one of the feet to keep the table from seriously wobbling every time I press a laptop key. I tested each table before sitting and they all wobbled..some much worse than the one I chose.

On one of the tables is a public use jenga game. Seriously. It isn't possible to play jenga on a wobbly table.

Most of the hard chairs for sitting, whether at a restaurant venue or at these tables are supremely uncomfortable because they are missing most of their backs. It is possible they are designed to keep us moving but jeez...we need some time to gorf down our food or finish our Nine hole Golf game or crib game.

All over the resort property there are stairs and ramps and without notice..different levels of floors. The level changes are very small and not noticeable from five to six feet above. Suddenly you are a couple inches lower or higher. Very off putting. And the stairs down to the small crowded beach are old rickety wooden ones that are totally uneven. Other cement stairs here don't have railings..not good for some of us tippy or drinky people!

And speaking of stairs, the one pool for the three nine story buildings has a wee set of stairs attached to the wall of the pool and are very very hurtfully narrow. Painful!!! And if statistics are correct sixty percent of us have diabetes of some sort. This means we have very neuropathic feet...again, painful!!!

One of our crew who shall remain nameless, bless her, had the ovaries to go to the lobby and give them what for and told them they need to put proper stairs in and out of the pool!!! I was so very impressed with her!!! In fact we have made suggestions to her about other things she should go to the lobby about!!!

The beds...oh the beds. They are big and very comfy. The bedding fresh, beautifully white. The pillows are plentiful various sizes for our comfort. These lovely beds are placed on large sticky outy wooden platforms. I now have a gouged leg and so does Kathy from rounding the corners of those beds and taking chunks out of our shins. The last time I did it, and of course at exactly the same spot it had already happened once or twice, I swore like a seasoned sailor and proceeded to walk over every inch of the room, bleeding the whole way then climbed into that pristine white bed. And it's clear that due to our age in that room it wasn't.....well you know. It was from an injury dammit!!!

The food is all Mexican...which is lovely. But after a while it becomes monotonous. Every meal is basically the same stuff. But...their soups are unbelievably delicious. Nothing even slightly off about them!!! The salsas are also great except you can't tell if they are perfect or blistering hot. You have to ask and sometimes they don't even know.

Today at lunch I asked a lovely Mexican waiter which of the ten bowls of rainbow coloured salsa was safe to eat. He didn't know. So he took each spoon and dropped a glob on the palm of his hand and licked it up!!! hahahaha!!!! He eventually found the right ones. That is definitely taking one for the team!! Then he told me he didn't like hot ones!!!!

This morning I came down for breakfast and there was a line up out the door. I went past it to the girl signing everyone in and she said it would be a half hour wait. Now so far we have been able to get a table but honestly I wasn't surprised. That buffet dining room is so small..at least small for three nine story buildings. I was mad. Half an hour later it was not so busy but still....just a little off.

Lastly, well there is more but you get the drift. I left the bedroom this morning and guess what? The elevator isn't working. Sigh. I can walk down from the fifth floor but I am not sure my fat ass would make it back up before our stay here is over. I found a person that works here and she got someone who finally fixed one of them. Always just a little something...keeps it interesting!!!

One last word...one more thing. This one is not a little off. This one is perfection. And that is the employees here. Whether it's the restaurant staff or the cleaning crews or the bartenders....the men and women who work here are absolutely amazing incredible people. They are so attentive, friendly, kind, no judging people. I love them. It is amazing how you can make friends with them so quickly and so memorable. I will remember Filipe from the dining room forever.

Next I will write about the seven people I am here with. Hahahaha!!! Just kidding!!! I would never do that. Let it suffice for me to say that this is an amazing awesome group to be friends with. I don't feel worthy. TFL&TTYL