I just can't do it anymore. Plain and simple. Little three year old boys can defeat me. True, if I lost one hundred pounds, or did a few hours a week in the gym it might help. But I doubt it. And this is why.....
Bill and I decided to take F to Nanaimo for the day. It was suggested that we take him to Jumping Jiminy's. Ok, now I know I am not the youngest chicken on the block, but an indoor playground? That charges eight bucks a kid to play in it? Whats wrong with Macdonalds play area, I ask. Oh well, if it makes the kid happy, why not?
We left for what should have been a one hour drive. The first hint that this day was not going to go quite as planned was a big loud announcement from the car seat in the back "Hey Gma, I can undo this!" I look to see that he had undone a vital part of his seatbelt system. And when I say system I mean system. Its a four part process, each one more difficult than the last. You need Hercules hands to complete it while wedging yourself between the back of the front seat and the back seat, one knee on the back floor and one awkwardly cranked at a ninety degree angle upwards and back. Leaning on forearms and elbows, you have only your wrists left for leverage to get the parts into the proper parts and snapped shut. Its hard when you are young and strong. Put on thirty years and a hundred pounds and give it a try. Right. And he got part of it open. JEEEEEZ!!!! So we pull the truck over, I climb out, wedge into the back, snap it all together, unwedge and get back into the front, do up my own belt and off we go. "Gma.....I did it again!!!" (so proud of himself). JEEEEZ!!!! This time the rebuckling was accompanied with a lecture that involved words like "no" "danger" "angry" "home" "NO JUMPING JIMINY"S!!!!!"
Upon arrival, we entered the facility, handed over money, put on wrist bracelets (they couldn't get one to fit Gpa) , removed shoes, (ten minute process for Gpa) and entered the hallowed ground. We were met with a dingy, worn carpeted giant room that had several play stations and cafe tables spread about. F immediately disappeared into a monstrous three story high play system. It involved long tunnel slides, giant planet shaped spheres to jump in, ladders and nets and ropes and narrow little alley ways that went straight up in the air. That big huge system sucked that kid up and ate him before we could blink an eye. And we didn't see him again for half an hour. He could have been killed in there and we wouldn't have known it.
Eventually he surfaced long enough to ask for food. So.....on the sticky menu placed on the table, the choices were..mac and cheese, hot dog, burger, fairy bread (mushy white bread spread with canned icing and covered with sprinkles), pudding cups...well you get the idea. Judging by the smell permeating from him, it was time to go anyway. Like the bad Gma I am, I had totally forgotten to bring in his diapers. So with promises of Sushi (his fave), we went out to the truck in the parking lot. I told Bill that he had to be changed first.
Now, this little guy is turning three on Hallowe'en. He is a boy. Being a boy, he is not trained and still in diapers, but he is doing adult size business in the britches. Need I say more. There was no room on the back seat to lay him down and he outright refused to lay down on the parking lot. His mom had told me she changes him standing up. Ok. I am all for that.
So, off with the shoes, off with the pants, undo the diaper, and plop....it all went to hell right there. By the time I was through he needed his entire legs and backside washed, he needed clean socks and the truck seat needed shampooing. The only one enjoying it was Molly, our grotty little pom.
Off to Costco. We worked through our list and taste tested everything along the way. We found the sushi and looked at the toys and books. Generally, we had a lot of fun. I have to admit though, I was beginning to flag a little. We went to the eating area and Bill bought fries (another fave of F's), coke zero and a hot dog. F had his sushi but wanted fries. Bill had put beef gravy all over them. Try to explain to a three year vegetarian why he can't have one of Gpa's fries. It didn't go well. But he ate all his sushi, drank some pop (our bad) and we left happy.
We made a stop at Walmart to buy him his birthday present. He picked out an excavator and a bulldozer. Good choices! So, he was dying to play with them and the dogs were dying for a wee run. As we drove along the freeway, I spotted a spot we could pull off, far enough from the road to be safe. Poor F had to play on a paved road, beside a hill of riprap rocks, not the best local but oh well! Within two minutes, F let out a howl and loud noises of displeasure. The treads on his cat had come off. So I put them back on, again and again and again and again and again. OMG!!!! I forgot that you have to check out every single thing you buy for defects like this. Kill me now......
Eventually we made it home with a sleeping little boy and two exhausted grandparents. A good day was had by all!!!
Sounds like fun!!!!!
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