BREASTS…JUST AN OBSERVATION

I was at Cookie's yesterday for a while before heading to the ferry.  And as usual had a really good unwinding time.  Brian came home and it was so good to see them both.  But…Brian might have regretted it, in fact he took off before I left…back to the golf course.  Cook and I were visiting and the topic of the Fat Lady Store and bras came up.

I was telling her how I had had a lovely conversation with Myle's mom Helen and that part of the convo was about the fact that bras at the Fat Lady Store were buy one get one free.  Now when bras are between forty and fifty bucks, thats a deal you don't want to overlook.  So I unthinkingly launched into my bra rant, poor Brian.

  And if anyone who is reading this is uncomfortable with the topic, please stop reading here.  I have decided that I am going to post even those posts that may not be appropriate for everyone…but I promise I will warn you so the choice to have your mind besmirched can be your own.  So, be warned!

 I went to the Victoria store here before going over to Vancouver and before I knew I was broke for the next couple of months.  I think I have mentioned this before but when you go to Europe and Britain, women's breasts over there are real.  Their shape is the shape the woman is born with.  They are soft and real and swingy.  But here, in North America, there is a very noticeable difference…at least out there in skinny broad land.

  I noticed about a decade ago the cloth bras disappeared and along with it the real breast shape.  In its place the padded foam bra.  This foam bra makes your breast its shape, not yours.  It makes sure there are no perkies (accidental nippleage…which is pretty natural now and then). Every skinny broad in north america ended up with identical unnatural unmoving breasts.

Note…skinny broads, not us big and curvy ones.  We, fortunately, still had real cloth options, allowing our 'girls' to fill them out and look natural.  That is until the other day.  I sashayed confidently into the store with renewing my bra stash in mind.  The back wall is covered with every imaginable colour and size.  And guess what?  Every single one was a foamy firm shaped bra…not one cloth one to be seen.  I was horrified!  I cannot wear one of those!  I panicked!!! 

 The lady that works there saw my distress and dashed over (rather she waddled over) and asked if she could help.  Yes, I answered, get me a real bra.  She was convinced that she would find one that was just right.  I was convinced I would not.  So I challenged her.  I told her that as the bra gets bigger around, the cup gets bigger in size.  Just because I am a 46 incher around doesn't mean that I will fit in the cup that comes with that circumference.  You have to understand here that when the foam bra is laying on the table the cups stand up firmly like there is a person in it.  The bras I wear don't, they lay flat until something fills it out.

So she found my colour and she found my 46 inch circumference and she picked the smallest cup size they had.  Off I went and after a ten minute struggle putting it on (new bras are hard cuz you have to keep changing the length of the straps til its right) I finally got it properly on.  And, just as I had predicted, I DO NOT fill the cup.  My chest just pooled in the bottom of the cups leaving the top part empty.  Ridiculous!!!  The cups could totally dint in and stay dinted in.  When I put my tshirt on it looked like someone had taken a giant icecream scoop and scooped out my chests.  I showed the clerk and no matter what she brought they didn't work.  She finally admitted defeat. 

 I would go braless but I need somewhere to put my phone, I don't carry a purse. Mind you, now that I think of it, my giant iphone 6 plus would fit better in a two thirds empty bra cup.  Sorry Brian. I didn't mean to rant on such a personal subject.

I got home last night to a very cold house and a very lonely bunny.  He thumped and thumped for a long time.  Parker isn't doing so well.  I have had to help him walk and go outside.  Tonight though he seems to be doing a little better with his hind end.  Damn inbreeding!  Poor guy's hips are giving out.

Today was my fave day.  Didn't get dressed, stayed on my laptop too long, played my piano, played with my doggies and watched crap tv.  A good day was had by all.  TTYL