Thursday, December 30, 2010

Oh Lord, Give Me Strength

We have dogs. A big one and a little one. I am not a dog person but even I know that you don't feed dogs people food. All sorts of awful things happen when you feed them people food. They get sick. They get runny diarrhoea. They become fixated on food and lose their desire to be normal dogs. They die. All sorts of awful things can happen.

This knowledge makes no difference whatsoever to Bill. For years and years, through several dogs, Bill has been told, nagged, yelled at, lectured and beseeched to not feed the dogs people food. But in spite of obvious consequences, he seems to be totally unable to exercise self-discipline and refrain from tossing inappropriate tidbits to them. On one famous (in the immediate family anyway) occasion a few years ago, he fed one of our dogs twelve chocolate cupcakes. When I found out, fairly soon after the feast, I tied the dog up on our deck as per the normal routine and with payback purpose in mind, I moved a lot of lumber, tools and bricks in to the same corner as the dog. By the time that poor dog was through, there wasn't much of the building supplies that wasn't coated in a fine layer of excrement. And, because of what was under the deck, it couldn't be simply hosed off. Bill had to carry every piece down to the back and hose it off there. And our poor dog recently died from kidney failure. Think there is a connection? Now, no matter what Bill has done or not done, any episode of poo in our house is his responsibility. He has to clean messes up off the floor, he has to pick up poo outside, he has to clean our little hairy dog if poo sticks to her.

Yesterday morning both dogs were put out to do their morning ablutions. Molly, the little hairy one, stayed out way way longer than her normal routine. Finally I called her in. As she came up the sidewalk she would stop every few steps, hunch up then drag her butt a ways on the ground. She would then walk a few more steps, stop, hunch up and drag her butt. She finally arrived at the door and upon inspection there was the evidence that she had been eating something she shouldn't have. Nicely glued all over her ass was....well....you can guess. I hollered for Bill. Bill didn't come. So I scooped her up and holding her at arms length I went in search of him. I found him in the bathroom, stark nekkid and about to get into the shower. I simply handed the dog over to a surprised Bill and exited the bathroom. No words were necessary. After a few minutes I heard Bill go into the kitchen and back into the bathroom. I was busy so I didn't pay much attention.

After some time I was kind of wondering what was happening in there, I opened the door and peeked in. No Bill. No Molly. What??? So I stepped into the bathroom, gingerly pulled the shower curtain aside a little and OH MY GOD!! There was Bill, facing the shower, holding Molly, ass side up under a pounding stream of hot water. He would swish her this way. Then he would swish her that way. Then he would kind of bounce her up and down. She looked positively terrified. I quickly left the bathroom, shaking my head.

I retreated to the kitchen and proceeded to do the dishes. After a few minutes i happened to glance down the hall just as the bathroom door opened and a very wet dog was fired out into the hallway, door shutting quickly behind her. For one stunned moment she just stood there blinking, Then suddenly she shook herself vigorously, hunched her back, then plopped her ass on the floor and started to drag her ass, again. Behind her was a little brown trail. I dashed over, scooped her up, flipped her upside down and, yes, there was the evidence. All the shower did was make it mushier and messier. Jeez!!! I also noticed that a lot of hair had been hacked off her back end. I grabbed her towel and wrapped her up and went back into the bathroom. And, yes, sitting right there on the counter were my good kitchen scissors, the ones we use for opening food bags, cutting green onions, snipping beans etc... And they were covered. One more item for the dog bag.

After he was dressed, Bill took her to Doggie Sudz and had her washed. It would just be a whole lot easier for dog and all to not feed her people food.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

I DIDN'T KNOW I COULD RUN!

Yesterday morning we met Aryn out at MacDonald Beach by the airport. There is a large walk area, field and river for the dogs to run off leash. I have never been a "dog" person per se. I am not one to make a decision that would put the dogs' need over my own or that of one of my family (read human). But, because it was a chance to combine dog walkies with a visit with Aryn talkies, I agreed to meet her.

The first thing I noticed on our way over was the weather. It was blowing and sleeting. Anyone who knows me knows I DON'T WALK IN THE RAIN!!! I had to laugh and I said to Bill "I will have to tell Aryn that this is the kind of weather where we stay in the truck and watch all the crazy dog walkers battle the weather and laugh at their doggedness!!"

When we arrived, Aryn and I unleashed our beasts and started off. As cold and sleety as it was, it was awesome walking along the river and watching the dogs play and run and meet and greet. This really is new to me and I was surprised how much I enjoyed it. I still think it had more to do with Aryn than making my dog happy. I love spending any time I can with any of my kids, especially the older they get. They become increasingly more interesting and increasingly more illusive. We had a lovely time.

When we left, Bill and I drove over to the runway and watched the planes landing for a while. When leaving, we kept an eye out for random hunks of driftwood for the garden. I spied one in a blocked off dirt area beside the bird sanctuary waters. Leaning on a five foot high pile of dirt, was a fairly long piece of log/driftwood, all swirly and well worn. I had Bill stop the truck. I hopped out and stepped over the log barrier and bent down and flipped the log up and over. It was perfect! Then I looked down where the log had been and sitting right where the hollow had been, was what appeared to be a nest. About the size of my hand was a pile of grasses, feathers and tiny twigs. Bill got out of the truck and came over. I was going to boot the little pile, but something made me hold back. Bill said it was probably a nest of some sort. I said "Poke it!" He did, he flipped the top portion off. Holy Jesus!!!!! At least fifteen mice bolted out of that nest. They just kept coming and coming and they scattered everywhere at a million mlles an hour. Within a nano second one had bolted right over onto Bill's shoe! Well, this fat old lady screamed like a little girl and ran like a gazelle! Honestly, I didn't know I could move like that!!!!! I leapt over the log barrier and stopped and turned to look. Oh CRAP!! They were running right over those logs and under the truck and right at me. I ran and ran some more and every time I looked back there were more and more...EVERYWHERE!!! Well, I started laughing and I just couldn't stop. It was the funniest thing and those little mice just didn't stop coming up out of that hole. Oh MY God!! Finally I bolted over to the truck and leapt in. Bill, big old Bill, had been standing stoically in one spot by the nest. And finally even he started to shake his legs and do a little evasive dancing. He finally marched smartly over to the truck and hopped in, much more quickly than usual. Laughing, we drove off. I took a moment to feel really bad for the mice. They lost their little house and it was perfect for them. And we didn't even take the log!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

PURPLE GLASSES


I have new glasses and they are purple! I love them.

Whilst in London, Bill and I went to the tacky, emo, goth market in Camdon Town. It was freezing cold and slippery but fun just the same. As I sat at the picnic table sharing my lunch with about forty pigeons (on the table and helping themselves right out of my dish), I noticed that the world had tilted just a little. What the heck? Upon inspection I noticed that my glasses had broken in the upper left corner. The frame had completely split and it was only a matter of time before the lens would fall out completely.

I panicked. First my front tooth falls off my upper plate and now my glasses were broken and I was a long long way from home. As I sat there in total turmoil, swatting at pigeons, I noticed a little old east indian man, bent over his jewelry making table. His sign advertised cleaning and repairs of jewelry. Yes!!! I thought. Repairs, it said. I know my glasses aren't jewelry but he must have glue and tools! So I called my ever faithful Billy over and said, "Here, take these over to him and see if he can fix them." I took off my specs, rendering myself blind, and sent them off. He was over there for over twenty minutes! It seemed to take forever. Finally Bill came back with repaired glasses and a big smile. Apparently there was no way the fellow would take any money!! I went over a profusely thanked him.

Later that afternoon we were in the Victoria Station shopping centre. I leaned over Bill's shoulder to see what he was talking about just as he flung his fist up to point. Smack! Right in my left eye and snap! there went my glasses. Only the break was much worse this time! So I sent him off and he came back with crazy glue. We sat at a table in the food fair and removed my glasses and let him fiddle around until he had them all glued together. I put them on and aside from a wee tilt on the left lens, they worked just fine.....until I took them off. They were glued to a bit of my hair and long story short, I am now missing a little clump of side hair and man did that hurt!

So, today I humped myself down to LensCrafters and picked out a pair of dark purple raybans, awesome glasses, and a second pair to make into sunglasses. I love them and whats more no one is even noticing them so they must fit in really well.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

AN ENCOUNTER

Something happened the last day we were in London last week. It keeps floating around in my brain. I think maybe if I write it down here it will go away and park itself where it belongs in my mind, and stay there.

On that last day we had a whole morning to kill. Our hotel was near a shopping centre at Victoria Station. I suggested to Bill that we go there to look for leg warmers. We hadn't been that successful in finding them up to this point.

By the time we got there though, my back was hurting to the point where walking around was now totally unappealing. So he sent me up to the food court and he said he would go around searching. So up I went, bought a coffee, and started to look for an unoccupied table. There wasn't one. So, I looked for an empty chair at an occupied table that maybe someone wouldn't mind my sitting at. I never do that, not sure why but I don't. As I searched around a young woman sitting alone at a table for two caught my eye. She was sitting before a pushed away half eaten breakfast, her hands wrapped around a cup of tea and her face was a study in total grief. Her whole aura emanated sadness and despair. I approached her and asked if she minded if I sat down with her. She answered yes, with more reluctance than desire. I thanked her and sat down.

It was uncomfortable, awkward. Neither of us said anything for a moment. To help get past this part of the "sharing a table with a stranger" I quickly and efficiently "accidently" spilled a wee part of my coffee. Quick as wink, acting more out of instinct than a favour, she grabbed her breakfast napkins and started mopping. I was apologizing profusely and she was acting as a hostess, cleaning and reassuring. She took the mess including the detritus from her meal to the garbage, and returned to her table and tea and me. I thanked her and the awkward moment eased.

She asked where I was from, probably noticing my accent. I told her. I asked if she was Christmas shopping. She said no, and it all slid into silence. Finally I leaned forward and asked if she was alright. She continued to look into her tea. I said that if she wanted to talk, I would be a good one to talk to. She doesn't know me, I don't know her and I was leaving that afternoon, never to be seen again by her. But...if she preferred not to, that was fine too.

She looked up and her eyes had filled with tears. As they slowly slid down her cheeks she told me she had lost a baby yesterday. Oh My God!! What do you say to that? So I leaned in and just simply said, "Tell me. From the beginning." And she did. About halfway through her story I saw Bill approaching, and I silently signaled to him to go away. Having been married forever, he understood what was happening, bless his heart.

She told me about her little boy of three at home. She told me about a loving and wonderful husband. She told me about wanting another baby and getting pregnant so easily. She told me about the feeling she had the other day. The feeling that something wasn't right. She told me how she went to the Doctor and found out she was right. Things were not okay. She told me about her trip to the hospital the day before, removing all evidence she ever was pregnant. She told about her profound and devastating grief, her lost little baby. What does one respond with to that?

When she finished she actually apologized to me for pouring out this whole sad story to me whilst I am on holiday. I couldn't believe it!! So I told her the only thing I knew.

I told her that when my youngest was 18 months, I accidentally became pregnant. I wasn't ready for that but we quickly became adjusted then ecstatic. We prepared the nursery, bought some baby stuff, picked out names, told the family and explained it to a very dense one and a half year old. I told her how at sixteen weeks, due to my age, I went in for my amniocentesis to check for genetic problems. I told her how the technician doing the preparatory ultra sound rushed out and came back in with a battalion of doctors and nurses. I told her how after a few more minutes of searching sliding on my tummy, the doctor kindly told me the baby was no longer living, in fact had died around 12 weeks.

But...I went on to tell her that I immediately started trying to become pregnant again, and within two months I was. I told her how months later they handed me my youngest son, a son I love more than anything in the world (well as much as my other three!!). I told her that if not for losing that "Wee One in the Middle" as we named him/her, I would not have Monte. And that is unthinkable. So...I suggested she go home and start trying for the one she is supposed to have and to just never forget about the "Wee One in the Middle."

She smiled a little and leaned forward and put a hand over mine. All she said was thank you, squeezed my hand, smiled again and got up and left. I continued to just sit there completely in another world when I suddenly heard "Hey!! I found them!" And there was Bill, swinging a bag of leg warmers in the air.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Home Yet Again

Well, we arrived back yesterday evening. The trip home was smooth and easy. The more DIY travelling becomes, the better it is. While we were in London we met my brother Stan. He was on his last leg home from a two month African Safari. Needless to say he had a million amazing stories to tell.

We started with breakfast at the Jury's inn where we spent the nite. He regaled us with fascinating stories through breakfast and in the car all the way to Stonehenge, Bath and Stroud (our Dad's roots). All the stories were about the camping, animal spotting, truck breakdowns, scenery beyond compare, photography etc.... Most fascinating.

On our way back to London he happened to mention something, just a tiny aside, that instantly caught my attention. He mentioned another travel mate, and she was from Campbell River, where my brother lives. Now, seeing as there are only six people on this trip, from all over the planet, another person from Campbell River would be just too much of a coincidence. "What??" I asked. "From Campbell River?" I asked incredulously. "Did you know her? Was that planned? WTF??????"

And then he told the most amazing story, far more interesting and captivating than his lion/zebra encounters!!! And I hope he never reads this blog because he is such an honourable person and the lady that showed up on that trip is an older person and friends of friends of theirs and he would never publicize her faux pas. But I will! Don't tell him though.

It took me all the rest of the whole two days he was there to try to understand what happened. It was all a little bizarre. After a gruelling forty hour trip and a long walkabout in Cape town, he was understandably exhausted. While sitting at a table in the lobby at his laptop, he fell sound asleep. After about two hours, in the deadest of dead sleeps, someone tapped him on the shoulder and awoke him. He looked up to see (I will call her anna) Anna standing over him grinning. Anna is best friends with a friend of Antonia (Stan's wife) The friend (I will call her betty) Betty is eighty one years old and Anna helps her out as Anna is only about 70. They have been best friends forever. Stan and Antonia have been friends with Betty for years and through her have become acquainted with this Anna. But, according to Stan, after much prodding and nosing from me, admitted that Antonia and he don't like her because she is so self centred. They don't have a lot to do with Anna, by choice. And, there she was, in Capetown waking my brother from a deep sleep. He said that initially he thought he was having a nightmare, but reality soon sunk in. She had heard about Stan's trip, and without a word to him, she piggybacked on his trip and just showed up.

Stan was in shock and disbelief and totally horrified. He didn't say much to her at that moment, picked up his stuff and went to his room. Two hours later the anger had built to a point that he knew he would have to confront her. So he went to her room and knocked on her door. Out in the hallway he confronted her. He gave her holy shit about how he had spent months researching the trip, years and years thinking about the trip, planned and packed with huge forethought and many lists and he sure as hell was not prepared to share this experience with her or have to spend one minute looking after her. Keep in mind that there was a lot of gruelling physical hiking etc, putting up your own tent every night, sketchy food etc.... This woman is over seventy and not that fit or capable. He ended by issuing an ultimatum. Either she quits the trip or he would. So she agreed and went to the tour operators. A while later there was a knock on his door. The tour director (and the tour people is another whole unbelievable story I wormed out of him) threatened Stan. He told him that if she didn't go they were going to charge Stan double! Long story short, she went, she needed looking after and Stan sucked it up best he could to make it all work as best as possible.

Somewhere in there he started to talk about the evil woman tour guide that was with them. Some of those stories were incredible....she was evil!!! Far more interesting than the animal stories!!!! And I know there is way more I haven't heard. I can't wait for xmas and I shall pump him for more!!

The reason I am writing this story is to get your opinion. Did he have a right to react so strongly? Did he have a right to issue that "you or me" ultimatum? The whole time I was listening to him two things kept popping out to me. One of them was how this wasn't his first story to tell (and we had skyped quite a bit before London so lots of opportunity) and did she not have the right to go on this trip and not check with him first? So bizarre and I would love to hear your opinion!!

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Coincidence??!!

At the moment I am sitting in a very narrow, lumpy, bumpy, (yet surprisingly comfy) bed, typical of all the little hotels in London. It is about four in the morning, and I am completely unable to stay up past seven at night or sleep past three in the morning. This used to be awful back in my earlier travels, but now due to internet, I quite enjoy these solitary middle of the night hours with my little lappy all lit up.

First thing I always do is check the emails. I am looking for that scary email from one of my family that is marked urgent. None comes but just not seeing it is a comfort. Next I load facebook and give it a quick scan. If one of my chillins' is on I talk to them for a wee while. Then I go back and deal with an average of approximately thirty to thirty five emails. Then I check the blogs I follow.

This morning I read Aryn's latest post. She mentioned something that made me sit up and take notice. She mentioned that whe watches episodes of Being Erica, for free, on the CBC website. Now, I am always looking for free tv episodes to watch. Thanx to the CRTC (whom I HATE) being in Canada just plain sucks. You cannot get free tv episodes of any interest or ones that would be of any significance. I am simply not into Nature Canada or David Suziki's latest guilt trip. So when she mentioned a show called Being Erica...well that sounds like something I might watch. I have never heard of the show, as I try to avoid CBC as much as possible (for political reasons I won't go into as it will turn into a horrible self indulgent offensive rant) but if it turns out to be something I would like....bonus. So I loaded up a stickie and made a note to check it out when I get home.

After completing my compy tasks, looking up useless stuff, I started to get impatient with the ultra sketchy wifi connection, I decided to shut it down, watch some tv and maybe go back to sleep.

British tv is weird. There is one channel that carries American/Canadian /British shows (as opposed to news) so I put that channel on (it was in the middle of some movie) turned it down and got settled in comfy in my lumpy bed. But...the movie was kind of interesting so I tuned in. As I watched I noticed that the main character was named....Erica. Huh!! I thought. I kept watching to the end and thoroughly enjoyed it. I managed to remember one of the cast member's names and grabbed lappy and looked it up. It was the pilot movie for.....wait for it.......Being Erica!!!!!! Wow!!!! Loved it and thanx Aryn for the heads up!! I maybe won't be in a tub of bubble after running in the rain...but I am going to enjoy it!!!