LINE UPS AND URINE

Hong Kong has turned out not to be what I expected at all!!  Probably out of all the cities, other than New York, I have been to, this is the most modern and beautiful, in a different way  from Singapore.  This place reminds one of Vancouver with a few more China Towns.

But….I don't think I have ever spent such a length of time up close and personal with urine.  One way or the other, other peoples urine will enter my consciousness numerous times during the day. .  If it isn't off the floor of the toilets, then its the seat, or seeing some guy up against a fence.  I do have to say that there are public toilets everywhere, and they all have attendants trying to keep up with a population of people that still squat when you should sit.

The other thing I am not liking is how you have to line up for EVERYTHING and when you do,  you have to fight to keep your spot.  It just isn't in our nature to budge and push and get cross when someone is trying to weasel their way up.  And even if its just a cup of coffee, there is a line.  And, nowhere to sit.  These people sit, everywhere.  I have never seen such a population of people that just sit, anywhere, anytime.  This city has been forced to erect signs up on every ledge and wall…"NO SITTING".   When sitting IS allowed, there will be 3 people to every one chair crowded in.   Consequently there is never ever anywhere to sit. We noticed this at the world fair in Shanghai too.  And they will fight each other to the death to get the best spot.  If someone at a table for 3 near a window gets up to leave, there will be a massive rush from people already sitting elsewhere, all converging on that one poor little table.  The winning six will then sit, with their backs to the window and the view.  Go figure!

Hong Kong is built up the sides of mountains and hills.  It truly is a beautiful city, divided in two.  Kowloon and Hong Kong Island are connected by tunnels etc…but the real method of transport is the Star Ferry.  Its like the sea bus but a bit shorter trip.  Those ferries have been running since 1870's.  When something works here it really works.  Easy on easy off.  We bought a two day hop on hop off bus pass.  By far the cheapest best way to tour around.  You get a lot of history, and this city has history!  We had one taxi driver that spoke very good English.  He was an original Hong Konger.  He was NOT happy about all the Chinese coming to this city!!  So funny.  Today we are going to go into Kowloon to the markets.  I am looking forward to it but..its really hard to get a taxi.  So I am going to look up here on the lap top before we go for a hotel near there.  Its about the only place a taxi will show up.

Air Canada.   Ah Jeez!  I do not know why I booked our flight home with them.  I know better.  I hate them.  Every other airline in the world allows 2 checked bags on international flights, or if they don't its about 25 bucks for an extra one.  Not Air Canada. They don't allow two and the extra one is 70 bucks.  The food sucks and they are so often late.  We met a couple from Abbotsford at dinner last night.  They were saying exactly the same thing.  I am ashamed of our national airline.  Never again.  

Well, I am going to jump into the day.  Unless something amazing happens I won't be sending another email.  Thanks for reading!!   Helen

HANOI AND TAYLOR SWIFT

At the very beginning of the trip we saw a lecture on Vietnam and the various trips.  I discovered that we had chosen a very looooong 12 hour excursion inland to Hanoi and we would be missing the rocky outcrops and caves and grottos excursion.  But…when I attempted to exchange, the excursion lady talked me out of it.  I am super glad we went to Hanoi, but I think I missed the most beautiful part of Vietnam.  I shall have to come back.

It was a very long trek into Hanoi from the ship.  About four hours inland.  We passed wonderful scenes of farming and lots of little villages.  We passed some huge tech factories, camera factories and shoe factories.  Hanoi was very loud and very very busy.  Cars are very very expensive here so other than taxis, buses and small trucks, there were not many cars on the road.  But the scooters more than make up for them.  Thousands upon thousands, and they don't give a crap whether you or even themselves lives or dies.  35 thousand people die on the roads each year in Vietnam.  I have truly loved our visits to this country and want to come back again some day.

Today we suite people had lunch with the Captain etc…it was a sumptuous beautiful spread of seafood, beef and veggies.  Complete with bottomless chardonay.  A lot of very hoity toity people down there but a couple that sat with us were from Vancouver too AND she is a successful selling artist!  She was full of info to pass on to April on where to go to get started selling her stuff.  Its all juried in but that is good.  Can't wait to tell her.  We exchanged emails.  I wasn't sure why I was even going to that lunch but now I know why!!

So now everyone is packing and getting their passports back and asking the poor concierge a million stupid questions.  I don't think people can think for themselves.  Well, the women, I KNOW why the men are in here asking stupid unnecessary questions!  Last night, around nine o'clock there was a tap at our stateroom door.  I thought "What the hey??"  Upon answering it was a lady I had met in the suite lounge here a day or two earlier.  She had been having trouble with her iPad and the internet so I helped her out.  I have done that a LOT over the last two weeks with different people.  She couldn't get it to work for her again and the lounge was closed and she had seen where my room was and she was desperate!  So I went to her room, her husband was in bed, and I spent a half hour solving her problem for her.  It was so bizarre!  I have spent a great deal of time over the last while helping people send their emails and do their photos.  Like I know what I am doing…When I came back to the room, Bill, who was watching a show on his computer, complete with headphones, looks up and says, "I didn't even know you were gone!"  Jeez!!!

I had half a foot of hair cut off today.  It had gotten so long and crazy I actually scared a little kid at the tunnels.  He was offering everyone his ice-cream until he spied me!  Its so much neater and easier now.  While I was up there, the hairdresser Chelsea (from Spokane) and i got talking music.  We discussed this and we discussed that, she is young and into all the little localism indie type music.  Then the topic ended up on Taylor Swift.  Well, we hate TS and started to expound on what a skank she is and a poser and her music is awful blah blah blah.  We went on quite a while about it.  A few minutes later a large older red headed woman came out from her appointment from behind the screen beside us.  She marched over and said, hands on hips,"Taylor is my niece….and she is a lovely talented scrupulously moral girl.  Its people like you that give these people a bad name, not the girl herself.  Its people like you!!!!! (by now she is really agitated)  I think its just mean and vindictive and lying to be saying the things you were saying!!!"  Holy Crap!!  What are the odds of that happening?  In fact I am still not sure she really wasn't just an avid fan (but she isn't 14 yrs old so I don't know).  Poor Chelsea was mortified!!!  Not me…I just shrugged and told her "I cannot stand the girl's music.  Maybe all the other stuff about her dating little boys by the numbers is exaggerated, but her music sucks! Sorry if that offends you and please do feel free to pass the info along.  Thanks."  She stomped off and Chelsea and I about died laughing.  I do not think she is TS's aunt.  Those things just don't happen.

So now its time to sign off.  I will see how the wifi is in Hong Kong in the hotel.  If its good and not expensive I shall maybe report on Hong Kong….we shall see.  We are to leave Hong Kong at 7 thirty in the evening of the 23rd.  But…we cross the international dateline so truly I don't know what day we get home.  If you figure it out please send me an email and let me know.  I will pass the info on to Monte who is kindly picking us up!  TTYL

Da Nang

Oh, those pictures you miss!!  The ones that go to that place in your head and plague you later when you're trying to sleep!  Man! I missed a doozy today!

There is a couple on this ship.  Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE! knows them.  They are, what we would say, missing a few filters.  They are huge (bigger than Bill and I), very loud (louder than Bill and I) and will say anything to anyone no matter what it is at four million decibels  (way more forward than Bill and I).

Today, in this little old village with narrow streets, teeming with people and scary motorcycles going so fast, these two people decided to hire two tuktuks.  These tuktuks were very small, thus they needed two.  With great noise and attention- getting guffaws and loud comments, they climbed into their respective vehicles and settled in.  Off they went, with her in front, yelling really loudly to her husband  in the tuktuk behind.  Such a spectacle!  The British couple we were standing beside tut tutted and said we should give them wide berth, have nothing to do with that lot!

About half an hour later, further down on another corner I heard a howl and great crashing behind me.  It was the lady.  Her tuktuk had either overbalanced or a wheel crushed because she was upside down in a screeching mess out on the little cobbled street.  Motorbikes were squealing to a stop and all the white people rushed over to help.  I scanned around and all the Vietnamese were killing themselves laughing behind their hands.  Jeez!!  It was like a scene out of a bad movie!  She was screaming "LANCE LANCE LANCE"  on the top of her lungs and Lance was trying desperately to extricate himself from his tuktuk all the while yelling, "I'M COMING BARB, I'M COMING, I'M COMING…HANG ON!!!"  Oh my god it was so frigging funny.  When they finally got her up and she was barely hobbling, she turned on the poor hapless little tuktuk driver and smacked him with a plastic bag of stuff  she had in her hands.  Honestly!

Another thing happened last night that is a first for us.  The Captain came on the blower, just at dusk, to say that he was stopping the ship, he was seeing a distress light signal from a very small vessel off the starboard side (which happened to be our side of the ship) and we needed to check it out.  So out on our private deck we went and sure enough there was this tiny tiny conical reed boat, attached to a long line of floats on a fish net,  with a man standing in it, with this weird long rowing implement, rowing to beat hell to us.  Now and then he would stop and frantically wave a flashlight.  I had noticed a larger fish boat about 2 miles away, and the Captain said that we were 18 miles from land.  It played out slowly before us and I obligingly took pictures, which have been posted on face book (sorry Stan and Antonia!).  He reached our ship and the captain finally came on and said they had had to find a Vietnamese interpreter on board and discovered that his master fish boat was on the way to pick him up (the one I had seen earlier)  but could he have some food, drink and maybe some money????  So the Captain told us they gave him food and water, and upon a very loud blast from the ship's horn, we sailed off, leaving him well fed and waiting for his comrades.  The Captain sounded somewhat chagrinned and ticked off.

Today we docked at Da Nang.  We didn't go into the 1 million strong city but bypassed it to go to Hoi Han, a Unesco Heritage protected village.  This is the place that is nearest what was called China Beach.  A very charming little village it was.  We bought Chinese lanterns, one of which  will replace the "pantaloon light fixture" hanging over our dining room table at home.  We were taken through museums, a personal house, a pagoda and then finally left to our own devices for a while.  Bill and I went for a walk off the beaten path through the working/living part of the village.  So peaceful.  I truly love Vietnam the most.  Tomorrow is a day off.  Yay!!!!  TTYL  (I forgot to tell you about being naked,  I will write about it tomorrow)

NHA TRANG

What a wonderful surprise this city was!  Such a contrast to what we have seen so far.  In spite of their poverty and lack of infrastructure, the city as a whole decided to take some serious pride in themselves and keep the place clean and approachable.  They have completely succeeded.  

I know most of you saw the pics I posted so I don't need to go into detail.  We hired a car, driver and a guide for the day.  They took us everywhere, including tea in a private home, rice fields up close, a long leisurely lunch in a five star resort right on the ocean with both of them eating with us, and a pagoda or two thrown in for good measure.

During our two hour lunch we were able to visit with the two of them.  We learned so much more about Vietnam, the real Vietnam at the street level.  So interesting.  The people are so approachable and friendly.  This is a magical place.

I have no time for more right now.  We are off to a lecture on pirates!  We have been to this lecture before but its worth hearing again.  Next email I will tell you about an awful experience I suffered through this morning.  All I have time to say right now is to ask this….have you ever come face to face with someone, not a related someone, totally, bareassed, in all your humungous glory, completely naked???!!!  Oh lord save me now cuz thats what happened.  TTYL

VIETNAM TUNNELS

I like Vietnam.  In fact I think I like it here more than any of the other places.  Its funny how each country has its own "feeling".  The people here are very friendly and not so terribly poverty stricken (at least not on the level Cambodia is) that it becomes a barrier between us.  We had a fantastic guide yesterday.  He, as did all Vietnamese, came to see the American forces as the enemy.  He himself was born during the war, but he was brought up by a community that is still reeling from the effects of that war.  The US dropped napalm all over the area.  Consequently everything living died.  All the foliage we see now is regrowth.  They are into the second generation of children being born blind and missing limbs.  His own father died at 45 (after spending a year as a pow).  Thousands upon thousands of Vietnamese are still missing…and will never be found.  Millions died.

It was interesting being on a bus that had quite a few veterans of this war on it.  So many conflicting thoughts and feelings.  All I can say is I don't think I have ever been so glad to be Canadian.  We were not major players in this war.  We also had  some Aussies on the bus.  They played a pretty large role as well.  But what really can be said is this:  all around from every angle…this was not America's proudest moment.  They simply should not have been there.  Obviously someone somewhere profited from this war, but it sure wasn't the Vietnamese.

The country is beautiful.  It really is.  Its soft and gentle and rolling rice paddies etc…The area we went to was lush and green.  The tunnels were pretty mind blowing.  Its hard to imagine how they built over 250 miles of tunnel with little baskets and little chopping tools.  They are like the little engines that could.  When the fighting became too great, the whole village, several hundred people, would go down into those tunnels.  It was hot and almost unbearable.  But being blown to bits or napalmed was worse.  Truly incredible.

Today we are in Nha Trang.  We have hired a private car for the day.  I am happy about this.  Bill is increasingly difficult to drag around.  He does exactly what he wants to…no care for what is going on.  And if he pays attention he can hear what the guides are saying just fine, but he doesn't.  He depends on me to repeat everything, keep track of where he is supposed to go, remember the bus number and the times to be back to it.  So, yesterday I told him I just simply wasn't going to.  It was up to him to hear everything, pay attention and be where he was supposed to be at the right time just like everyone else does.  So I took off and kept up with the guide.  And sure enough, right away, I look back and there he is, all absorbed with the first display in the bush we came across.  We had all looked, taken a picture and moved on.  But Bill?  Nope.  There he stands, taking 40 million stupid pictures, paying no attention to us at all.    We disappeared into the bush on one of the many trails.  Left him behind.  The guide had a helper that continuously had to go back and show him the way.  Selfish much?  Later, much later, we ended up at a beautiful spot on the river for lunch.  I took a seat, saved him one and proceeded to dish up etc.  No Bill.  We started to eat.  No Bill.  The guide comes and asks me where Bill is.  I dunno! I state.  After a good half hour some lady comes over, with Bill in tow, and cheerfully states, "I found your husband for you."  I didn't speak to him, for almost the rest of the trip.  And why, I ask, is it the women that get the glares when their husbands misbehave?  Why are we supposed to keep them in line?  But, after yesterday I see he must be treated like an untrained two year old.  He could do it, he just chooses not to.  Makes me mad…can you tell?

Today will be better.  But I know I will have to interpret everything the guide will say.  Bill won't understand his accent and doesn't hear that well in a noisy car.  I will see if I can arrange for him to sit in front.  Should help.  Anyhoo, I gotta bounce and go get some breakfast.  Bill is still in bed.  Think I'll leave him there!!!  TTYL

CAMBODIA

I have mentioned this before,  the more money spent on education, the more advanced the country.  In Thailand education is paid for by the government.  Even though you do see very poor living conditions in places, for the most part Thailand was humming along fairly well.  Then you get to Cambodia.  The conditions those people are living in, even the better off people, were appalling.  And we hadn't seen garbage strewn everywhere like this since Central South America.

We left the ship on a very  dilapidated bus, one Bill could barely deal with.  We were in a coastal city of about 200,000 people. The first stop was at a pagoda/monastery.  We were immediately accosted by dozens of little children, begging and selling things.  On Bill's brother Frank's suggestion, Bill brought tons of pencils and tiny pads of paper.  He started handing them out, much to the little one's delight, much to the nasty man with a cell phone sitting on a motorcycle's dismay.  He was running the whole begging show and pencils just don't cut it.  I took his pic and will post it on facebook.  We had a good look around there and then back on the bus and on to a posh hotel/resort on the beach.  

The hotel seemed nice, what we could see.  The water was beautiful but again, as we sat under thatched roofs, we were accosted by people selling things etc…  I finally caved in and for five bucks succumbed to a fifteen minute hand and arm massage.   Mmmmmmm so gooooooood…reminded me of you and me when you were little Aryn!  Nothing beats an arm massage.  There is so little to do here that to fill in time they take us to a resort spot for a rest and drink.  It was nice.  We then moved to "downtown".  We had been in this market before so we opted for a tuktuk ride.  Am I ever glad we did.  He drove us all around the little downtown area and on the edges of the town, where we saw makeshift farms. The roads were very very rough and broken or unpaved entirely.  And…no matter how tattered and barefooted and hungry, everyone, and I mean everyone, had a cell phone.  A few times I just shut my eyes and hoped for the best.  Motorbikes are careening around in every direction everywhere.

It is Chinese new year today.  Everywhere we went people had little fires lit in front of their places.  They were burning stacks of fake money…american dollars.  Apparently, this money goes to their dead ancestors for their dead relatives to use in the hereafter.  What we DIDN"T see here were people just sitting around doing nothing…like we saw a lot of in Egypt and the middle east.  Everybody was industriously doing something.  And a lot of the men were handling the babies and toddlers.

We finished in what they called a fishing village.  It was truly the most squallerous dirty smelly place I have ever been.  But…the people were the happiest and most fun.  The buildings along the road and piers were dilapidated and collapsing and absolutely filthy but all the people were smiling and busy.  What was truly fun was watching and listening to the overly protected tourists reacting to it all.  Some of them turned back…they didn't want to get their shoes dirty, or they couldn't stomach the smell.  The tourist that was most fun to watch was Bill.  Honestly, for an old dude who is stiff, can't lift his feet or turn his neck or can't remember his bus number, he gets into the whole experience more than any other  traveller.   He gets a bright excited spark in his eye and a goofy kind of grin on his face and just loves it all.  He is kind of shy to try new things so I do the advanced scouting and necessary communicating and then he just jumps right in and goes for the ride.  He really is almost the perfect travel mate. Almost.  He does go the speed of dark.

Anyway, we are back in the Neptune lounge, much to Bill's delight, eating tiny tuna, egg, cucumber, salami sandwiches and dainty little desserts.  I think I am on my third latte.  Tomorrow is a sea day thank goodness.  By this time in a trip we both are living in deadly fear that there won't be a bathroom near when we need it.  We need a ship day!  I am in the midst of watching a delightful Masterpiece Theatre series called Lark Rise to Candleford.  I love the show.  Bill is reading a 30,000 page book or something like that.  My next face book pics will be Cambodia.  TTYL

SEAT KARMA

A quick note here,  I have to comment on this.

Generally speaking, the average age on this ship is….old!!  The men are older than the women usually.  As life on board carries on, one can see the women running around making all the plans, keeping things straight, leading their husbands to where they need to go, doing all their thinking.  And on their part, the men bumble around, looking kind of helpless and lost and attempt to keep up with their wives.  Except in one place on this ship. And in this place…its very different.

That place is the NEPTUNE LOUNGE.  This is the lounge that only this deck with the suites people are allowed to use.  In this lounge is a library of books, newspapers, CNN on a flat screen, tables and comfy chairs and couches.  There are amazing snacks, h'or doerves (sp) desserts, a coffee bar etc…  AND…a concierge…and she is the most beautiful Asian girl..tall, beautiful, extremely approachable, friendly and helpful.  And the men love her.

It is so funny to just sit and watch them stride, not shuffle like usual, but stand up tall and STRIDE purposefully into the lounge and go straight over and in strong voices, not mumbles like usual, look her straight in the eye and say something silly and catchy with their "hello Nickolai".  They then strut around a bit, lengthen the conversation with her, make silly jokes, laugh heartily and stride out.  And I am telling you…nowhere else on this ship does that happen.  Even Bill gets a little glowy and goofy in there…its like they can't help themselves.  Its so funny to watch!!!  We women like her too but to see the change in the men is amazing!  Its such a huge contrast.  Even the most feeble crippled men straighten up and haul out their mojo!

And one last note on the seat bullies.  Today, in Cambodia, they were sitting three seats up from us on our tour today.  When we got back on the bus, someone (a single gentleman) had TAKEN THEIR SEAT!!!!  Hahahahaha…as they walked back to the only seat empty, the one the gentleman had been in right behind us, she was complaining loudly about people that take other people's seats!!!  I couldn't believe my ears!  I almost died laughing and as she walked by I just shook my head and said "Karma!!"  She quit talking but I noticed they got back to the bus after the next stop early and took their seats back.  Hahaha…so funny.  and so highschool,, I know but hey…..I am going to put their picture here and you can see who I am talking about.

6. BANGKOK DAY ONE

Holy Hannah!!!  What a couple of looooong hot days !!!!  The trip into Bangkok is about 3 to 31/2 hours.  We got out to our bus, me dashing ahead so I could get a good seat.  A good seat is as close to the front as possible,  on the NOT sunny side and no window obstruction.  We don't always get one but this time I made sure.

We got stuck in traffic many many times and it took 4 hours to get to the river port for our boat ride.  And of course, there was one tiny bathroom and a line up that snaked back to the ship almost.   Women are so slow!!!!!!  What the hell are they doing in there?

The river ride was awesome!!!  The breeze felt good and our guide was so informative.  We learned all about living along the river and those that make a living on the water.  So many boats.  They call this the Venice of the Far East!  It was fascinating to see all the houses, and their "back and front yards" growing water plants etc, just like a real garden.  We saw an immense number of Wats (temples)  We got off at the Orient Hotel, an amazing five star hotel and were led to a beautiful huge dining room and were presented with the most sumptuous, exotic, delicious meal I think we have ever eaten.  The food was beyond incredible and so many dishes and varieties.  I couldn't possibly explain it, there are no words that can describe that amazing meal!

We got back to our bus to discover that two people from the back took our seats.  This is NOT COOL or acceptable.  I was shocked.  I just stood there and stared in disbelief.  The lady promptly spoke up and said, "oh there was no one in that seat, you can sit there"  pointing at a seat that had been empty…for a reason…it sucked, it had no clear window.  So I turned to her and said, "Please be my guest and you can take that seat and I would like ours back."  She said "No I'm not moving now.  We are settled here."  This is such the height of bad bus behaviour.  Just then an Aussie we have gotten to know hollers from the back "Come on back here with us fun blokes!!!  This is the fun part of the bus so come on back!!  We would love to have ya"  So we went back there, got great seats and spent the rest of the trip in paroxysms of laughter.  At one point though, when we were in the market I happened to stand beside her.  I knew she had cruised before (by her bag she had and the pin on her husbands lapel).  I leaned in and quietly told her that she must be a newby and never cruised before (old time cruisers hate that) and that I knew exactly what she had done (front seats are premium) and I didn't spend 20.000 bucks (I didn't but she doesn't know that) to sit in a blocked window seat.  I wouldn't let her defend herself, I just turned on her and walked away.  COW!!!

I think the flower market would have been much more a fun experience if it hadn't been so crowded, so hot and so easy to get separated..which would have been disastrous.   And Bill!!  He needed to take four million pics so he was constantly being left behind.  And when he would stop to take pics, he would raise his hands with the camera, but also his cane would shoot straight out in front of him seriously beaning people in the head (they are short here).  I constantly had to go back and find him.  I felt like a dog..you know for every step you take, the dog runs ahead and back doing a hundred to your one.  The flowers were beautiful, and it smelt heavenly in there!!!  It took 45 minutes to go from one end to the other.

The next stop was a temple and I didn't get off the bus.  I had been to that temple before, wasn't dressed appropriately and was just too damned hot.  Next we were taken to a gem place where we could buy just about anything.  We opted for the cafe and had a peaceful half hour with some yummy coffee.  Back to the back of the bus and four hours to get home.  It was the longest crazy day and we were exhausted by the end of it.  Had a quick bite to eat, watched two more episodes of Downton Abbey and off to bed.  Tomorrow Cambodia.  And its Chinese New Year!  Yikes!!  They have been warning us!!  TTYL  (if we survive)  Also I will tell about today…

5. KO SAMUI ANOTHER ONE!!

5.  KO SAMUI

Apparently Koh Samui is very similar to Phuket.  We tendered over to the dock and were immediately bombarded by at least a hundred taxi drivers, wanting to take us around the island.  It was a fairly long walk off the pier...lined with every imaginable taxi, all with drivers desperately trying to get our business.  We finally caved in at the end of the line.  A particularly nice looking Thai man convinced us to pay the 100 bucks and get a tour.  Partly we did it because it was so muggy and hot that walking became very unappealing, very quickly.

So over to his taxi we went, and his wife was inside as well.  They were perfect.  They spoke just enough english to help us along, but not so much that we had to keep up strained conversation.

Off we careened, narrowly missing mopeds, motorcycles, bicycles, cars and giant trucks.  We circled the whole island and not once did we go through an area that was not built up.  We hardly could see the Gulf of Thailand.  We passed many many scruffy dirty shops full of things either being sold, fixed or both.  We passed under thousands of sagging wires.  We passed entire families piled onto narrow little motor bikes of various sorts.  We almost ran over countless dogs.  We saw many old white men holding hands with beautiful very young Thai girls.  We stopped at a beach and saw an astounding number of very fat ladies in skimpy bikinis, totally loving the sun and water.  The foliage on the island was very lush, but I must say that Maui has spoiled us.  The difference is money.  Maui has money.  Thailand does not.  It shows unfortunately.  But one thing they have in common is the incredible friendly people.  They were totally delightful in every possible way.

We stopped at a waterfall, which was hard to see and encountered people riding elephants.  So weird!  We stopped at a viewpoint.  And we stopped at a very crowded spot that had a special outcropping of rocks.  If you are face book friends of mine...you will see what I mean.  We then stopped at the beach, found a beach side bar and had a beer and people watched.  We then rode back to the tender dock.

We had a wee wait and then we all piled into one of the ship’s tender boats.  They are enclosed and hotter than hell.  Bill and I were about last on and the only seats available were at the very front tucked into an alcove, completely blocked by some asian people that WOULDN’T FRIGGING MOVE!!!  I had to get pretty pushy and finally a ship person came over and hollered at the three of them in another language.  They moved.  It is a fifteen minute very very up and down rocky ride and was probably 110 degrees F in there.  We were all sweating.  The Asian lady that had to move started to get faint and sick.  Crap! I thought she was going to hurl, right onto my shoes.  Both men with her were fanning her vigorously and feeding her crackers.  But she did make it but it took three men to get her off the boat, first I might add.  She was all fainty and crying and sighing and oh so helpless.  A few minutes later they got onto the elevator with us and she was laughing and talking and swinging her bags around.  Jeez!!!

Tomorrow...I am not sure.  I think we are on a river boat ride through Bangkok!!  TTYL

4. KO SAMUI

4.  KO SAMUI, THAILAND

Hot and muggy!!!  It is still dark out, around 6:30 am.  I am up in the Lido drinking coffee and checking emails.  Bill is still asleep.  He sleeps alot and I try to but just can’t.  We don’t have a shore excursion today.  You have to tender onto the island in big rickety wooden ferry type boats.  We have done this here before.  We decided to just ferry over today and poke around the little village instead of tearing around the island in some vehicle .

I don’t think this is good...but we are getting recognized, by staff, by past travellers.  Yesterday we went to the port lecture in the theatre by Ian.  We had him on another tour sometime in the past.  He is older and British and very funny and totally interesting.  After the lecture Bill hopped into the loo and I was standing outside reading something on the wall.  I felt a tap on the shoulder and it was him.  He said “I have seen you before on one of the Holland cruises!  I want to thank you for coming and laughing at my jokes.  I appreciate it!”  I was stunned!  He sees, and talks to, thousands of people..thousands and he remembered us.  I was talking to Bill about that and we decided that it probably wasn’t good.  I could see it if we were young and astoundingly gorgeous...but we aren’t.  I could see it if we were physically horrible and challenged, but we are not.  At least three times now we have heard “Helen and Bill!!!!”  It would be one of the crew, remembering us.  I think that is due to Bill.  He is always saying crazy and inappropriate things to these guys.  We have run into two couples that apparently we have been on trips with before. Unfortunately I am not one to remember or log trip details and I am afraid I didn’t remember them.  Awkward!!

It is now daylight.  I am going to mail this and report on what we see later.  TTYL

4. A QUICK TEST

We finally got on the ship...after standing in a line a thousand or more deep, for over two hours.  This was the worst check in we have ever been through.

Our suite is so magnificent it is making us nervous.  The room is bigger than our living room at home.  Not sure about this....the Neptune Lounge, only for us suite peeps, is pretty amazing.  Great lattes etc.., teas and snacks.

We went up to the Lido for dinner at 8 last night to find it closed!  I don't think I have ever seen it closed before.  When I checked the schedule we found that they have made some changes, and the lido hours is one of them.  Kind of makes sense.  We went back to our room and ordered room service...french onion soup and steak sandwich..and it was delicious!

Okay this is a short entry today to see if I will be blogging or emailing.  I am going to add three pics just to see.  Here goes.....TTYL

I tested and it failed so I will be doing this by email, and pics by facebook.  I will keep trying to put the written part here though.

3. FINAL FROM SINGAPORE

It rained, no, poured rain all day today.  I felt right at home.  We sat for a long time downstairs in a coffee shop just watching the people go by, drinking yummy Italian coffee.  Late this afternoon we dove out into the rain, across the street, down into the underground area and walked until we were completely lost in a sea of shopping and restaurants.

We stopped for supper in one of those places, a place called Hot Pots.  So we ordered (I say so easily) something or other, never too sure what .  Along came a little pot of broth, set upon a fire lit stand, a plate of sliced chicken, a plate of sliced beef, a plate of bean sprouts and gai lan.  And so we sat and waited, completely in the dark as to what to do.  We watched others but they were eating something different.

Finally Bill flagged a waiter down and asked what we were supposed to do.  He showed us how to put the meat in the now boiling broth, and add veggies etc...we felt so stupid.  It was delicious of course and we basically made our own little bowl of food, using a delicious chili sauce.  As I was about to finish my mouth started to burn, and I mean freaking burn...and it wouldn't stop.  I can handle pretty hot stuff but this was a whole new level of burning pain.  I started to eat the ice from my drink, I drank most of Bill's beer, ate more ice and it just wouldn't stop.  Actually it got worse....hotter and hotter.  I was almost in panic tears mode.  I just couldn't understand why it wouldn't abate, even a little.  And then I suddenly realized...those little chili thingies were stuck all through my stupid fake teeth!  I didn't care who was looking,  I whipped my uppers and lowers out of my mouth, grabbed a napkin and wiped them down.  Finally, my mouth started to cool down a little.  Stupid stupid teeth, the bane of my existence.

MY KIND OF SELFIE

THE HOT POT

SOME OF THE ADDITIVES

FROM THE COFFEE SHOP

Tomorrow we get onto the ship.  I will probably have to resort to emailing my entries direct to people.  I will try to do it on here.  I prefer putting my entries on here and pics on face book.  At least that is what I hope will work.  So next entry will be from the ship tomorrow night.  TTYL

2. CRAZY HOT CITY

We spent the day just toodling around nearby.  We ended up in the enormous mall connected to the last hotel we stayed in here in Singapore.  The Malaysian people are beautiful.  And very kind and polite.  This would be close to a perfect city except for the cost of everything.  Hokey Dinah its expensive here. I went into the store Accessorize...a franchise you find everywhere.  There was a very small, about six inches across cloth zippered bag, flat like an open wallet.  It was really pretty...25 bucks.  Are you kidding?  In fact all the prices were shockingly high.

We came back to the hotel in the afternoon for a cool breather then headed by taxi over to the Marina Bay Sands, casino/hotel (3), and shopping mall.  This place is amazing.  The Asians go places with decorating and lights that no other people go.  Extreme architecture, extreme window displays, extreme entertainment.  Its all a little mind boggling.

We went for dinner in a restaurant in the bottom of this place, that I had seen last time.  It seemed like an intriguing decor and menu.  We ordered chilli crab, their signature dish here in Singapore.  As we started to eat, it became quickly apparent that I would have to remove one of my front teeth.  This tooth, such a pain in butt, is only held in by fixadent.  Several times a day I have to replenish the fixadent or the tooth falls out.  And I simply cannot eat certain types of food with it in, thus I remove it, put it in a wee zip lock bag I carry around with me.  When dinner is done I put it back in.  This is easy at home but when we are out I just simply don't order those types of food.

But here in Singapore, we had to have crab.  This being a very upscale restaurant, there were hordes of little wait people standing at our elbows, refilling our tea cup each time we took a sip, replenishing our napkins each time we used it, etc...So I headed to the loo and removed my tooth there and made every attempt to keep my mouth shut (hard for me I must say) and continued to eat the most delicious crab meal ever.  It was spicy, messy, lots and yummy.  When we were finished the head lady came over as the minions cleared our mess.  I told her how lovely the meal was.  She suddenly looked at me in horror and exclaimed "Your tooth!!!!!  Your tooth!!!  Is gone!!! Is gone!!!  You ate!!!  You swallow tooth!!!  Oh nonononononno!!!!"  So I had to, humiliatingly, pull it out of my purse and explain (she has very broken english) how my tooth falls out and I had to take it out.  Meanwhile every table within ear shot had heard her and were now paying close and embarrassing attention.  Ahhhh   humiliation at its finest.

MORNING SUNRISE FROM OUR HOTEL WINDOW

THIS CANAL SNAKES THROUGH THIS MALL..YOU CAN RIDE FROM ONE END TO THE OTHER

SINGAPORE IS ASTOUNDINGLY BEAUTIFUL AND CLEAN AND CRIME FREE

THE MARINA BAY SANDS....THAT IS SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE A SHIP ON TOP,  THOSE TREES RUN ALONG THE SIDE OF AN INCREDIBLE INFINITY POOL

THE DECOR IN THIS PLACE WAS AMAZING.  THESE MOBILES HUNG OVER EACH TABLE

Today I do believe we are going to try the hop on/hop off bus.  The only drawback is that you are out in the scorching hot sun.  Oh well.  I will post a few pics here for those that I am not face book friends with.  Those that have seen them already, my apologies.  TTYL

1. VANCOUVER TO SINGAPORE

GETTING HERE....Jan. 31 (at home) to Feb 2 (Singapore)

I know we all think that flying to Sydney is long and awful, and it is, but try flying to Singapore.  The first leg was 13 1/2 hours.  Then in Hong Kong, the change plane city we landed in we were to  have two hours to find our next gate.  Then from Hong Kong to Singapore is 4 hours.  A total of 17 1/2 hours in the air.  We left Vancouver a half hour late and by the time we landed there was NO time to dawdle.  A Cathay Pacific rep met us at the plane door and hustled us, and I mean hustle, across the airport, through security and straight onto the commuter jet, which was even bigger than the one we flew from Vancouver on.  By the time our butts hit the seats I thought we were both going to have heart attacks!!

Gross Alert:  On the first long leg of the journey, we were in row 52.  A nice looking gentleman was already in the window seat.  Before we even left the tarmac I knew this trip was going to be loooooong.  He was a very polite smiley man of about fifty.  And he didn’t do anything “wrong”, what came into play here was cultural differences, and as soon as we hit that plane we were on their turf, culturally, not ours.

The first hint of what was to come was a very long and pronounced clearing of phlegm from his nethers and spitting it into his napkin...over and over, very very loudly.  I almost gagged.  As the trip proceeded, so did other body functions.  The seats we were on, three in a row, were not bolted securely to the floor.  Every 15 minutes or so he would heave himself up into the air, causing the seats to jolt hugely, dislodging things from our laps even.  And every time he did this a very strong unpleasant gaseous odour would assault us.  Every now and then he would let out a very smelly, oh god...really bad burp.  And all through the trip he would stamp his foot on the floor.  He sat with his legs completely splayed, right over into my part of the seating area.  The whole trip, other than when he was launching himself into the air, his leg was right over on mine and his elbow dug into my side, and I kept a good few inches between me and the arm rest.  When he chewed his food he would smack with his open mouth, loud.  But the very worst of all, out of the corner of my eye, I could see he was picking his nose.  And...(Cookie stop reading here) he would reach out, roll it and let it go, and twice I felt it roll down my leg (I had shorts on).  I felt it.  Roll down my leg.  I wanted to cry.

But all is well that ends well.  Our lovely hotel gave us an upgrade to a fantastic room with the most amazing view ever.  I am watching the sunrise over the best part of the Singapore skyline.  And when we got in here a few hours ago, the moon was hanging right over the Singapore flyer.  I will attempt to put some pics on here later.  It is now 7 am here, and even though I am wide awake, I am going to try to go back to sleep, like Billy is.  TTYL