Firstly, lets get where we are out of the way. We completely crossed the Black Sea to the north shore on the southern most tip of the Ukraine. This little city, Yalta, is a health mecca...apparently the air cures all manner of things. Yalta isn’t very big and as is very much the norm for this part of the world, very run down and quite poor. The town is in a very pretty setting between the sea and the mountains..and fall is just starting so there was a little colour in some of the trees.
We drove 70 kilometres to Sevastapol, a Russian/Ukraine naval base, then to Balaklava, where the Charge of the Light Brigade took place. Then down into the town to lunch and a tour of an underground, tunnelled submarine repair place.
I don’t know but I have found this area both charming and weird. The people are not friendly and speak not a single word of english..not even WC or toilet or bathroom or loo. Speaking of which....
We had been to see a museum and then the war fields and had an amazingly delicious lunch (salmon and veg...delicious) and now it was time to go into the tunnels.
The tour was to be one hour long. So off we went. This tour took us waaaaaaay underground and into a mountain. We got about 1/4 of the way in when, most inconveniently I was struck with ‘la tourista’. Obviously there were no loo’s way in there. As a few minutes passed it became very clear to me that there was no way was I going to be able to make it to the end of the tour...in fact I was going to have motor out of there as fast as this fat little person could go. I told Bill, then took off like a bullet, hopefully in the right direction.
Every so often I would come across a dense group of people on tour and I would have to daintily, quietly as possible, wiggle and duck and push my way through, desperately clenching the whole time. As I was barrelling along as fast as possible I was actually spying dark corners and hidden spots that I could slip into if need be! Jeez, its amazing how you lose inhibitions when you are desperate!
I ran and ran and ran, doubled over on occasion thinking, “well this is it, I am not going to make it, Bill and Brian will never let me live this one down, wahhhhhh!!”
After what seemed an eternity I finally shot out into daylight, not sure exactly where I was...it certainly wasn’t where we entered. I headed towards people and did discover the buses parked nearby. And I spied a WC sign...which basically led nowhere that even remotely looked like a loo.
So I dashed over (I say so easily) to my bus driver and asked “WC?” Huh, shrug, shake of head. Clearly he didn’t understand me. So I elaborated, “toilet? washroom? bathroom?” Shrug shrug, finally in desperation I mimed pulling down my pants, squatted, and screwed up my face and grunted loudly...he finally understood! He pointed me to an unlikely corrugated iron building and blessed be! there were two portable loos. I dashed over and they were freaking locked...with padlocks. I dashed around to the doors on the little building and a woman indicated that I had to pay. I didn’t have any money. None.
I must have looked totally frantic because she just grabbed the keys and took me around and unlocked the door, in the very nick of time I tell you. This portapotty was filthy, urine smelling, sticky and gross and the most wonderful thing I have ever seen...ever! I have a dear friend I met on a trip to China...and he could tell you about a mad dash to a bathroom story of mine that happened at the forbidden city! One of my most memorable memories of that trip Dean!!!
While we were eating an awesome delicious lunch in a local restaurant (with three other busloads) a vicious very nasty lightening storm with torrential rain hit. The lightening was forking down and hitting the other side of the street and the rain almost collapsed the awning on the deck. It was quite exciting...and a very short storm.
On our way home later, though, driving down the 70 kilometre coastal highway we were stopped behind a line of vehicles. Apparently a slide caused by that little rotten storm, had closed the road, the only road I might add, and we were stuck there until it was cleared. And this is the first time ever in the history of our cruising we were actually late getting back to the ship. We had to wait quite a long time there but, and I am going to start sounding like a broken record here, but the Brits are truly the most fun people we have ever been with. No matter who you end up sitting with at lunch or dinner, you have a truly fun and enjoyable time. And whilst we sat there on that highway we all were laughing til our sides were splitting! Those old Brit dudes are sooooo funny!!! We had so much fun. Okay this is long enough. TTYL
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