DAY 19....AT SEA

I think I said in the post yesterday that we are kind of enjoying our at sea days this time.  Well I take it back.  Its tedious and boring.  We are beginning to really irritate each other.  And there is NOTHING to do.  NOTHING.

I am NOT going to go play trivia, or name that stupid tune, or play dumb bowling games, or lay in the sun, or jog nowhere, or go get my hair done :(, or eat more slops, or or or......

I am on my seventh book and I am now watching the most awful programs offered on the tv here.  Right now I am watching a documentary on British beauty queens and what became of them.  Really.  Previously, I watched a program on an obscure cave that was found in France some time ago.  Turns out there were prehistoric paintings in there, half of them we won’t ever see because they don’t want to walk on that part of the cave floor and wreck something or other...what the hell?  

But the one that takes the cake is the documentary on how the underwear industry developed and a lot of attention paid to the brassiere.  Actually all I took away from that awful show was it was inept men that invented the contraption.  Figures.

And Bill is driving me crazy.  What is with people when they get old, they become obsessed with bowel movements.  Half the conversations with the people that are over 80 are about bowel movements.  I remember my grandmother was like that...”Are you moving alright dear?  If not I have some of the bran muffins for you.”

When someone comes and sits with us, if they appear to be over 80ish, I know where the conversation is going to end up.  And so no matter what the subject, within five minutes, I am thinking “Yup, and there it is.”

I hate to say it but often its Bill that keeps  the subject going.

  Bill:  “So how are you enjoying the trip?”  Old Geezer:  “Oh aye, its okay.  Twould be better if I could get what’s in, out...if ye get my meaning like.”  Bill:  “Oh I get your meaning...spent the entire morning yesterday in the john.  Its the food you know.”  OG:  “Aye tis tis!  Ye know them puddinks a ta end ta meal...well they thicken ‘em with somethink binding...oh aye..I spoke to cook and he said they dint...but I know they do...oh aye aye like.”  Bill:  “Well I like to get a bowl of those canned prunes...they work very well for me”  OG:  “Really, well I’ll ha ta give that a try I will like.” 

 And on and on and on.  They LIKE talking about it.

And when they finally move to the next subject, it is almost always about their medications and the side effects the meds incur.  Oh My God!!!  And they all take the same crap.  So out trots the dizzy comments, the loose bowel comments, the memory loss comments, the coldness comments.....keep in mind they all wear hearing aids that just aren’t strong enough.  So they lean in to each other, cup their ears and say “What What?” a lot, or completely misunderstand what each other is saying.  I watched Bill and an old dude have a five minute conversation and neither one of them was talking about the same thing. 

Okay, enough.  Tomorrow is another day and hopefully something exciting and wonderful will happen.  I think I will find a different spot to sit.  Ooooo...can’t wait!  TTYL